Of Vampires & Werewolves - Monday, February 28, 2011

Actually, no, this isnt gonna be a disertation on how much I adore films such as the "Twilight" series and the most recent remake of "The Wolfman" (though it is the truth in both cases!), nor am I jumping up-n-down right now saying "I do believe in Vampires & Werewolves, I do believe in Vampires & Werewolves!!"; but, I would like to discuss the aforementioned subjects in certain terms because I think there are some questionable aspects regarding the subjects of Vampires and Werewolves which are very rarely discussed, and with the fairly decent success rate of those two aforementioned film franchises, what better time to discuss such things?

But there is an observation I'd like to share with everyone out there about both the "Twilight" film series as well as "The Wolfman" film (oh, there better be a sequel to that one!) For some unexplainable reason, the majority of my fellow LGBT brothers & sisters who have viewed such films have depressingly exclaimed to me "Oh, I (or we) didnt get anything outta those films." You mean nothing, nothing at all? I'm curious, how so? I mean, each one of those films is basically a true love story with a few dashes of supernatural actions thrown in for good measure. How anyone cannot appreciate those films for the ideology they represent - that true love, against all the odds from two different worlds, can conquer all when two people really truly love each other - is definitely beyond me. I find that aspect of those films not only fascinating, but it also makes their storylines extremely interesting as well. The relationship between Bella (a human) and Edward (a vampire) is comparable in its variables just as much as a relationship between an Hiv'er and a non-Hiv'er is (just one example); the parallels between the two are undeniable. Oh I know, there may be some folks out there who might exclaim "Geese Spice, how the hell can you make sucha comparison??" and all I can say in response to that is "Geese people, you all need to calm down and getta hold of yourselves, it's just a film for pete's sake!" Anyways, onto the subject material....

It has been said for many decades now that there is some teeny, tiny kernel of truth in every bit of fiction, myth and/or legend that exists out there on this great big planet of ours. Yes, I do believe there is some truth to that statement but I am also convinced that there are alotta things in this world that there simply isnt a logical explanation for. Do I personally believe in Vampires and/or Werewolves? Quite honestly, I am not saying yes and I am not saying no, and all because of what I just stated - there are so many things that our modern science and modern technology simply cannot provide a legitimate theory or explanation for. I'm not talking about fear or lack of knowledge of the unknown, it's just that I think it's a very simple issue that no matter how much such things as Vampire and Werewolf theories have been explored, investigated, and written about, there simply isnt enough tangible proof out there to prove that they do or do not exist.

Sometime when you getta chance, review all the plausible, as well as non-plausible theories, about each of these creatures that still circulate out there after all these centuries. Before there were any blockbuster films and/or computer games regarding Vampires and Werewolves, there were the medieval and Native American myths and legends about their existence. For those who ignore all those "Old World" and "New World" stories about both kinds of creatures, such individuals emphatically claim that such beings have never existed, that they are totally man-made like some fantastical-fairytale-on-modern-steroids gone awry. And of course, none of us is unaware of how people with certain medical and/or mental conditions can mimic the stereotypes of both Vampires and Werewolves, and that such real-life conditions are the real-life basis for all those silly stories. In fact, in the last 30 years or so there have been more stories and/or documentaries debunking the existence of both Vampires and Werewolves than anything else and that's fine-n-dandy, notta problem with me personally; however, by society and the world in general jumping on every single imaginable bandwagon claiming that neither of these creatures really really exists to begin with, in reality, when you think about it, such widespread dismissal is actually creating and providing a reverse atmosphere for such creatures to exist in the first place. No, I'm still not saying that such creatures are real, but let's take this just one more step further, shall we?

Strictly hypothetically speaking, let's entertain the following scenario for just a minute or two...let's say there really was a real-life Vampire or Werewolf running around in one of our local communities. Let's say that like in all the books and movies, sucha creature is demonstrating the usual stereotypical killing/feeding habits of its nature and the local forensics unit stumbles upon clear-cut, undeniable proof that sucha creature was indeed at fault for whatever was going on. Normal common sense would dictate that if the mystery of such a scenario was proven to be legitimately true, the proof would need to be presented to the general public and dealt with accordingly. Yeah, great. But, in our modern age, here in the year 2011, it has been ingrained into our minds, our way of life, that IF there was that one-in-a-trillion possibility that either such creature did indeed exist we are collectively, psychically attuned to invalidate its existence. In other words, I think that by so vehemently denying the existence of creatures such as Vampires and Werewolves, the world in turn is granting its permission for such creatures to exist. By denying their existence, it is not holding such creatures accountable to the laws of the universe that govern each and every one of our lives. Yes, continously refudiating that they indeed do not exist is like saying "Keep doing whatever it is that you're doing because you're not real anyways, you dont exist, so that's okay to keep right on doing what you're doing." Although I am discussing all of this in strictly hypothetical terms, you gotta admit, everything that I have just said does indeed make perfectly logical common sense.

I've said this more than once before in this blog, that I dont have all the answers to every mystery and paradox within the universe as we all know it but when I was growing up, I was taught from a very early age onward to never mock or make fun of things that I and/or others dont totally understand, to never form an opinion or theory on anything until I have all the information, all the facts, all the falsehoods, processed and in front of my eyes. Personally, I think that's a good very attitude to grow up with because it not only fosters a person to keep an open mind but it also teaches them to be more respectful of others and the world around us.

Usually during our childhood years, many of us hear stories about creatures such as Vampires and Werewolves and think stuff like "Oh my gawd, wouldnt that be so neat and kewl to be immortal? To never grow old? To have superhuman strength? To live on and on forever??" Even as an adult, I gotta admit, such thoughts are indeed entertaining to say the least - I mean, who wouldnt want to never grow old, to never have wrinkles, to never be sick again, to never have physical illnesses or pains ever ever again? Hell, it'd be like a dream come true for so many of us but unlike children, we adults already know there is a flip side to everything, even a flip side to something such as immortality. And justifiably so. Because the flip side of immortality that actually makes me feel practically overjoyed to be a human being, yes, even an Hiv+ human being at that, is this - who in their right mind would consciously choose to outlive every single person in the world they truly loved? Not just your husband, wife or significant other, but your family, both biological and extended, your friends - who would want to be that alone, for that long, for forever? Definitely not me. Of course, some of my history buff friends have commented over the years "To be immortal, think how one could sit back and watch the world change and evolve, and watch history unfold." Uhm that's fine-n-dandy guys, but isnt history taking place right this very moment, I mean, why not just appreciate what history is taking place in the here-n-now? Dont forget, even though they say all change is good, we as adults know that there is always a mixture of both good and bad changes in the world. Who in their right mind would wanna spend forever watching something like that happen, over and over again? Not me, after all, why watch history when you should be enjoying what there is of life? Granted, in a perfect world, to be immortal with the person you love the most would be the perfect scenario; but that's just it - whether one is mortal or immortal, we all know that the world is not a perfect place, never has been, never will be. And that's okay, that's the way it should be, because that's the way it's always been.

Let's face it, whether you believe in Vampires and Werewolves or not, I dont think something like immortality is all that it's cracked up to be. Seriously. Think about it. Who the hell would wanna be a Vampire in the year 2011? It's kinda funny when you think about it - how would you tell a Vampire "Hey Sparky, you gotta learn how to practice safe-sex" when their main sustenance, human blood, is one of the most effective ways to spread the Hiv virus? The same goes for Werewolves too - how do you tell a Werewolf "Uhm, you know that deer or two that you just had for a midnight snack? Well, I hate to break it to you Sparky, but now you got Lyme Disease!! Astalevista, motherf--ker!" No, I'm not mocking or making fun of either creatures, just using a bit of humor to prove a point and that is this - I dont think it's ever really been an issue of whether or not a person believes in Vampires and Werewolves, I think its more of an issue of how applicable their existence would be to our modern-day world in general. In other words, in this day-n-age, I dont think life would be any easier for those creatures than it currently is for the rest of us. Please dont tell me that you cant see both the irony and the humor in all of that. Okay, you can tell me that, but just make sure you do so while wearing a necklace of garlic or not during a full moon night, capice? In the meantime, I'll just keep waiting for "Eclipse" to make its premiere on Showtime as well as for "The Wolfman II" to start full production. Nitey-Nite! And as always, thanks for reading.

 

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

Epilogue: On Internet Bullies & Organized Religion - Monday, February 28, 2011

For those of you who did choose to read my piece from yesterday, as you may recall I had alotta crap to get off my chest and I have no regrets whatsoever in doing so. I wish we all could unleash against our bullies like I did but I also understand that in almost every bullying situation the circumstances vary greatly. Regardless, I think it's very important to stand up against any form of bullying as often as we can because nobody ever deserves to be treated that way by another human being. Be that as it may, I have one more thing I'd like to say about internet bullying, a realization that I arrived at thanks to several conversations that I have had in the past with a very close friend of mine. From these conversations, an idea was born that I'd like to share with you.

I think that it would be in the best interests of its users if Facebook were to form some type of regulatory advocacy commission or department that would directly addresses issues such as internet bullying and/or harassment amongst its users. Allow me to explain why I think this would be very beneficial to everyone out there. Did you know that in these bullying scenarioes, as well as practically every other internet scenario out there, that without any legitimate rhyme-or-reason whatsoever, if a certain amount of complaints are filed against any individual they can literally get their Facebook account shut down and closed for good? It's true. In other words, if any of us, whether it be you, me or the little girl who lives down the lane, says or insinuates anything deemed offensive, obscene or threatening by another individual, we can be reported and lose our accounts without any fair or just trial, without even having the opportunity to explain and/or defend our statements and/or intentions? It's true. And it's wrong. Facebook wants each and everyone of us to consider each of our homepages our own little piece of personal property on the greater worldwide web; yet, the bottom line is that whether we like it or not, if some miserly dictator-like personality pisses-n-moans enough about us, it's POOF!!! and we are history. Sad and unfair, but very true nonetheless.

Granted, the majority of us who are online are not moronic idiots (okay, perhaps a select few, but you know what I mean) for there is always some way to navigate around such irrational censorship realities. I'm sure that like myself there have been many of you who have seen their friends disappear because their accounts were shut down for whatever imbecillic reasoning, only to resurface again and again because in reality I think those folks feel exactly like the rest of us do - who the hell is Facebook to dictate what is acceptable and/or unacceptable in the way we communiate and interact with our friends, as well as the way we choose to express ourselves as individuals? That should be our choice, yes indeed, and let's face it, without each and every one of us, there wouldnt be any Facebook. Like a true democracy, Facebook is suppose to be about and for the people but it appears to me that it is, but in name only.

I've talked with other folks about my idea and the majority of those I discussed it with have agreed with me. On some, but obviously not all, of the social networking and chatroom sites that exist on the worldwide web, there are some sites that have implemented what are called "CSA"s, "Community Standards Advisors" and maybe something like that would solve alotta the bullying scenarioes that happen regularly on Facebook. The way it was explained to me is this -  if two or more individuals are having a problem with each other, a CSA is usually summoned to intervene in the situation and hopefully bring about a positive resolve from all parties involved. Of course, just as in real life, I'm certain there probaly are situations out there that cannot be resolved; but, I think it sure as hell would be a helluva lot more positive and productive if those involved in any kind of dispute would be given the respect and common civility to air their concerns and treated (as well as judged) fairly versus encountering such indignities as "Okay, this is why this has happened and tough shit if you dont like it, we arent required to explain jackshit to you." Cause let's call it as it is right here-n-now - that's EXACTLY how Facebook treats its users who had their accounts closed for whatever unexplainable, unimaginable reasons. They'll shut you down, offer an generally inconcise explanation and shut the book on you, no if's, and's or but's.

By the same token, yes, I do realize that the majority of us are fairly mature adults who should not have to have our words and/or statements policed but quite frankly, if anyone is going to instigate a situation with me, I'd feel a whole helluva lot better knowing that I'd be allowed my rights to a fair discussion and a half-way decent chance of solving the problem rationally versus the scenario of hearing from Facebook something as ridiculous as "Well, this person reported this-n-that about you and you're history!" without any intellligent, viable reason whatsoever.

And in that regard, this is truly one of the most worst things about being on Facebook - the atmosphere of semi-anonymity that is provided actually supports the breeding grounds for every goddamn bully that is out there. Yeah, really. In fact, when you really think about it, Facebook should be renamed "The Bully's Network" for it not only leaves each and everyone of us totally wide-open for confrontations with such individuals but it actually empowers those very same bullies by allowing them to complain about and/or report their victims as if it is their victims who are doing the actual bullying to begin with. Now I ask each and every one of you this - how fucked up is that?

Look, I know there's always gonna be bullies no matter where we go or what we do and yet, no, I have no intention of giving up my Facebook account; but, I think when it comes to the internet variety of bullies the best thing any of us can do is to be very aware of such individuals and do what we can to safeguard ourselves and those we are closest to, regardless if it's a social networking site such as Facebook, a chatroom server and so on and so on. None of us should ever have to sacrifice such basic rights as freedom of speech, fair trials (for lack of a better description) and the like just because what's happening is on a computer screen in front of us versus while we're walking down the street, working at our daily jobs, or going shopping at our local malls. Bottom line: bullying is wrong regardless of where it's taking place and it's something we all need to rally against together if we want to eradicate it as much as possible from our daily lives, both internet-wise and other. Thank you for reading.

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

On Internet Bullies & Organized Religion - Sunday, February 27, 2011

I know, that title is a double loaded gun unto itself but don't let it fool you because what I'm about to write about involves my personal contempt for both subjects. This will be the 1st time I have ever said this in this blog but it needs to be said before I go any further. Please, please dont read this. Yes, you read correctly. If you cannot - or do not - want to deal with someone unleashing a great deal of animosity, anger, and unabashed rage for these two subjects, then you need to do yourself a huge favor and exit this blog immediately. Why? Because for a little under two months now, and after 7 drafts (yes, 7 friggin drafts) I literally need to give myself full and total closure to this issue before it festers outta control any further than it already has. Dont get me wrong, it hasnt prevented me from sleeping, eating or going about my daily life; but, it has most certainly prevented me from being true to myself and I just cannot live like that anymore. This piece is 100% purely theraputic writing from the more deeper, private reaches of HivSpice's soul. Please understand that I need to do this for myself and myself only. I owe it to myself and if any of you out there are dealing with or have dealt with similiar situations in your own lives, then you too will understand why I as a writer, as well as a human being, will not require anyone else to validate any of it for me. What I've experienced these past several weeks is enough validation unto itself.

Funny, even after all those drafts you'd think that I'd know exactly where to begin but I really dont. You see, before sitting down to pen this piece I decided to totally delete all the previous drafts, so this piece is going to be totally free-based writing, no rehearsals, no re-drafting, no nothing. Why? Because I've had it. It's not just the issue of how bullying backs you far, far into a corner, but you also get to the point where you just cant take it anymore, where you have to put your foot down, make a stance and say to your bully "Bring it on right now you dirty motherfucker because this is your last and final chance, got it?" It is time for the Bully to be bullied right back, right now. I am NOT the type of person who can take someone CONSTANTLY throwing shit (both directly AND indirectly) in my face and allowing them to get away with it. Sweeping animosity under the rug simply does not work for me. I tried, I really did. Like everyone else on this planet I know when to pick a fight and I know when to walk away; however, in this particular situation, I am merely going to finish what someone else started. To thine ownself be true - a motto I simply can no longer live without. So to you my Bully, who also happens to be a denizen in the world of organized religion, the ferryman has come to collect his toll. Your endless tyranny of sarcastic innuendoes and callous mindgames towards me is over. 

Naturally, I need to provide the basis where all this internet bullying started in the first place but after doing so many previous drafts to this piece, I'm actually so sick-n-tired of not only writing about, but even thinking about it, which is why this is very psychologically healthy for me to release such demons to rest, for once and for all. Here is the fulll play-by-play rundown of everything thing that happened: about a month and a half ago, I posted something on my wall that was controversial, something that more or less was strictly a matter of personal interpretation.The Bully didnt like it and got into it with both a friend of mine and myself. I removed the post so as to diffuse the situation but that didnt work, it made matters worse. Then I thought about it some more and decided to repost the post in question because I thought to myself "This is ridiculous! I dont go around telling others what they can or cant post on their walls, so I'm doing what I want to do." Then the Bully posted a piece about me explaining her take on the situation (minus some key points, but whatever), as well as explaining why she was "hiding" my posts from her newsfeed and discontinuing readership on my blog. But then, a friend of the Bully decided to come over to my page and start shit with both myself and several of my friends BUT AFTER the Bully blocked my posts on her newsfeed (how convenient that was for her friend, wasnt it?); after that, the situation ended. Or so I thought. 

Please keep in mind two things throughout all of this. I did not once maliciously say or do anything towards the Bully or her friend. I maintained a calm, rational, and mature demeanor throughout all of it. Boy, was that a mistake. I shoulda acted under my own natural instincts and taken both those broads to task because then I wouldnt even be writing this piece right now. Second, yet equally foremost, take into account that the Bully sent the one friend of mine a very nasty message saying whatta bad person my friend was and how he "needed God in his life." Excuse me? If being a hypocrite, a liar and using organized religion in an attempt to intimidate people is the Bully's idea of what "God" is all about, damn, she needs to go back to school and relearn what "God" is really all about. Just because a person disagrees with another person does not give anyone the right to spiritually condemn another person. That's not only downright religious heresy but it's also sheer lunacy. No one, let alone an alleged preacher, should be using "God" or any other organized religion icon to cause offense to their fellow human beings. In fact, for those out there who claim to be "Christian", that is not very "Christian" by any means. It's a damn good thing the Bully was sitting behind a computer screen when she was pulling all this negative, hateful, judgemental crap on my friend because if she woulda said any such things to me in person, the story woulda been totally different. I dont care who the fuck a person thinks they are, anyone tries to shove organized religion down my throat the chances are very great that I'm gonna be shoving something too, and it wouldnt be no Bible either.

Since that situation ended and the dust settled somewhat, the Bully has been an extremely busy person. She has been busy insulating herself with some of my friends, basking in her public limelight and doing her usual song-n-dance routine of whatta loving, giving, kind, gracious, lovely and nearly divine person she is. Boy, I dont know how she's gotten away with it, but she sure has alotta people fooled as to what she's all about. She appears to shower the world with love and grace; BUT, dont you dare disagree with her because if you do, she'll get you for it. She will deem you "a bad person and bad people need to be punished!" A bad person?  Someone who needs to be punished? Just because someone merely disagrees with her? Oh my gawd, who the fuck does she think she is? She should be ashamed of herself for treating others that way. But I'm waiting. Just waiting. It's only a matter of time before she shows more of her true colors and quite frankly, I am very impressed that she hasnt slipped up yet because I can barely wait to see what happens to the next person who disagrees with her because that's all it takes to send her flailing over the edge. 

But I think the thing that burns me up the most about the Bully is her irrefutable belief that because she is a preacher of organized religion that that gives her the right to tell everyone else what they should or should not do, that she has the divine right to demand that others bow to her commands, to her whims and to her wishes. Sorry, but this homey don't play that way. As a matter of fact, I have never played that way. Just because a person is a minister of "God" that does NOT make them better than another person, let alone more holier than another person. Being a minister of any religion does NOT give a person the right to treat others as subservient to them because in "God's eyes "(if you believe in God, some people do, some people dont) we all are created equal. Being "God's messenger" may be considered a noble position but it does NOT give that person the right to act, judge or speak for "God." When any individual does behave in sucha manner it is ugly in "God's eyes" and whether you are a religious person or not, always keep this tenet in mind - "God" don't like ugly.

Over the years, I have taken on many, many religious leaders (Catholic, Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, Jewish, etc.) and I have succeeded at winning every battle I've had with every single one of them. Does that make me a better person than them? No, not by any means. But, each battle I have won is an extremely crystal-clear demonstration that one does not need to be "ordained of the cloth" to deal with those who are. All you gotta do is believe in and stand up for the truth. and for justice, and that's bascially all you need. Oh, those denizens of organized religion. I've run into some real doozies too, let me tell you - the minister who didnt like it when I told him whatta bunch of assholes both him and his congregation members were for saying horrible things about my family just because we were poor and didnt have what other folks had; the minister who told one of my sisters that our loved one's no longer think of us once they have died and gone to Heaven because they are too happy there to think of us; and, the minister who told me I wasnt welcomed in their church because I am gay and therefore of Satan. The list goes on and on but the bottom line is this - I dont believe in many of the organized religions out there because first, they use the Bible and their beliefs to condone hatred and bigotry towards their fellow mankind and second, they use their religion as an excuse to not think with their brains and their hearts. Regardless of what you believe in spiritually - or even if you dont believe in anything spiritually - the bottom line is that whatever/whoever made this world and all that is in it does NOT make garbage. "God" (if that is your belief) does NOT make garbage. Every one of us and everything in this world is here for a reason. That's not something you can learn from any organized religion, that type of knowledge, that concept of reality, is something that can only be acquired from within your soul. 

Wow, I thought by now I'd be cussing the Bully out and calling her every name in the book but no, I'm gonna do something much more positive, some much more beneficial for me and any other victims she may have out there - I'm returning ownership rights to all the filthy, horrible, malicious, spiteful mindgames she has played on me back to her. Every hurtful feeling, every derogatory comment, every harmful insinuation, I give them all back to her. That's right. I relinquish ownership of every negative, judgemental, vicious thing she has ever said and/or done to me back to her. Why? Because not only do I NOT want any part of that type of contempt for others near my psyche, but because I simply didnt deserve to be treated that way in the first place. Nobody on this earth deserves to be both scapegoated and castigated by another person simply because they hadda mere difference of opinions, at least not the way she and her friend did to me. If that's the way she treats other people all around, then she really shouldnt be allowed to be a minister of any organized religion to begin with. If you wanna lead people, you gotta have what it takes, you gotta be honest, you gotta be fair and you gotta be sincere. Anything that is fake, that is a mere illusion, that is a mere mask over one's true soul can never ever come to any good, not just in other peoples eyes but especially in "God's eyes" too. 

What was done to me was wrong. Hey, I'll admit, I'm not perfect either. I make mistakes too just like everyone else and I too can be extremely stubborn when it comes to defending my opinions/viewpoints; however, I would never intentionally harm another human being because of any indifferences I had with them (with the exception of those who would have malicious intent towards myself and/or others). Such behavior simply isnt part of who I am as a person, both emotionally and spiritually. I guess what hurts most outta all of this is that at one time I thought the Bully was my true friend, I thought she was someone I could trust, someone who would never turn their back on me but damn, did I misjudge that one. It's so sad. Karmic retribution can be a major bitch but the Bully is too wrapped up in herself to realize that. Too wrapped up to realize that no one, not even a preacher of "God", can go around mistreating people and get away with it. 

I feel better now. Better that I've gotten all of this off my chest. Better that I have finally released all the ownership of the heinous bullshit that's been plaguing me for so long back to it's original owner. Better that I am who I've always claimed to be - justa average, simple person who is basically good and decent, not the emotionless, hateful, spiteful charletain the Bully has painted me out to be in the past. Whether you liked it or not Bully, I've stood up to you and I just wanted to inform you that your days of steamrolling over me are done with. It's over with. I already know that you wont come clean with those around you and that's okay if you wanna continue your deceitful masquerade but just remember, sooner or later it's all gonna catch up with you and if the truth dont getcha Honey, don't worry, your "God" most definitely will. Or, as Glinda said to the Wicked Witch of the West in "The Wizard of Oz" (1939), "Be gone with you before someone decides to drop a house on you too!!" What if you should decide that I need to be "punished" even further? Then allow me to paraphrase everything I have just said in this piece - if you ever even think of disrespecting me even one more time, I'm gonna nail your fucken ass to the wall you krispy-kreme, cockjuggling thundercunt. There, did I make myself clear enough for you? I certainly hope so.

 

 

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

I Miss My Friends - Tuesday, February 22, 2011

For those of you who I do manage to touch base with on a regular basis when I get home from work so late at night, I thoroughly enjoy every single "How are you, Spice?", every single joke and every single personal moment that I am very blessed to share with each and every one of you. But, by the same token, there are many of you whom I dont get to touch base with on a regular basis the way I did before I started working two jobs and I'm not gonna lie, it's really been bothering me lately. Actually, for the last coupla weeks or so it's been getting to me quite a bit. There are so many of you who I'd love to know how you're doing, what's going on in your lives and just the usual things that friends talk about. I have real life friends I keep in touch with as well but since the majority of you out there online are real people just like myself, well, you're just as real as a friend I'd call on the phone once every other week to see how they are doing, or a friend I'd get together with for a cup of coffee and some good conversation whenever our schedules would allow. I hold all my friends close to my heart and am always sending good, positive thoughts their way; but, quite frankly, I've been feeling kinda left out in several of my online friend's lives and it's notta very good feeling.

I realized that each and every one of us has our own real lives to live off-line, both the good stuff and the not-so-good stuff that can and does happen to all of us. Let's face it, there are many times when a lot of us get so damn busy and wrapped up with what's going on outside of our computer screens that we always dont get the time to stop and take a minute to tell someone how much we are thinking about them, or how much we care about them or how much we miss chatting with them. I'll be the first person to admit that that has been happening to me a lot lately. Perhaps too much actually, but it's like that old saying "I'm dancing as fast as I can" or more like in my case, "I'm flouncing as fast as I can!"

It's actually kinda ironic that I am writing about this now because this issue was on the uppermost portion of my list of New Year's Resolutions - to do much better in the New Year when it comes to keeping in touch with my friends and letting them know more often how much I care about them. I've been trying harder to do better on that but so far this year I really dont think I've been succeeding as well as I had planned. Personally, I think once some badly needed changes take place in my life, I naturally will be much better at keeping in touch than I have been with many of my friends; but, until my search for a new living situation is successful, I'm gonna have to continue to keep working the way I have been the last several months (or is it a few? Feels like sucha blur at times....that's sad, I know) until any changes actually take place. But in the meantime, I find myself asking "How the hell do you deal with this feels-like-the-world-is-passing-me-by bullshit?" I suppose probaly like with everything else in life you just do the best you can and hope that others know and realize that. Im sure I'm not the only person who feels this way about life, where some areas of it are going just fine and others are practically 100% in limbo. That's quite an unsettling feeling, as if there is a giant cloud of unresolve hanging over your head, you know what I mean? 

Naturally, there's more than one medium in which to communicate with others and I gotta admit, in the last month or so I've had some extremely wonderful conversations with a few folks over the telephone. Telephone? Yes, you read correctly. Even with my anonymity I have taken the chance of trusting in others to keep my number strictly confidential and thus far, I am proud, as well as thankful, to say that so far I havent received any phonecalls from any reporters, nor from any homicidal maniacs (though in some cases it can be rather difficult to tell the difference between the two!) so I really do respect those who have continued to respect my confidentiality. That says something about people, that there really are more trustworthy folks out there than what society and the media have convinced us to believe in general. In fact, to the several folks I have had the pleasure of speaking with over the phone, I gotta admit, all of you have been awfully nice and very true about yourselves as people. I really admire and respect y'all for that, I really do. 

Of course, there have been a very few select people with whom after the telephone conversation was over with I said to myself "Why the hell did that conversation even take place, like, what the fuck was up with THAT, Batman??" That comment is NOT directed to the few folks whom I've had the opportunity to speak with only once or twice because I of all people do appreciate how busy all our lives get at times, so that's totally understandable. However, it is directed towards a coupla folks who only wanted to speak to me because they wanted to see IF HivSpice really was a real person or not. I am in no way, shape or form, angry with those few individuals because in the past I have actually challenged people in general to give me a call to talk to me if they didnt believe I was real, so no offense taken on my end. In fact, truth be known, I actually laughed once or twice after getting off the phone with one or two particular people because part of me wanted to say to them "Look, if you dont think I'm real, I'll mail you all my monthly bills Baby, if that isnt real enough for you, I dont know what is!!"

One thing I have noticed is that my experiences with those who have been insistent in wanting to get to know me better, as in something more than a friend, both via telephone conversation and online conversation have been virtually identical. There have been a coupla incidences where the person who spoke with me over the phone reacted the same identical way that a person having a personal, private online conversation with me has - once they realize I am the real McCoy, that I'm a real person whose everyday real life is just as exciting and/or noneventful as their own, they eventually become bored with me and walk away (I know, I've repeatedly said this for months guys, but it's the truth even in these scenarioes too). Luckily, I've been getting really REALLY good at spotting/sensing those types from 100 yards away! Oh hey, I dont get mad about that stuff because in all honesty you really cant blame the other person because you dont know if there could ever be any type of a romantic future with another person until you talk to them anyways, so no harm done. After all, I do know how they feel because I too am looking for that special someone with whom I will click with on all the right levels.

And, just because I am sharing all of this stuff with y'all right now does NOT mean that anyone who chooses to speak with me, whether online or over the telephone, is going to become an anonymous subject piece in one of these blog entries. I felt everything was relevant to the original subject matter so that's why I shared all my thoughts regardiing it. Just as others have respected and entrusted my confidentially, so have I done with them as well. Keeping it real, that's always been my personal motto and I see no reason to abandon it anytime soon.

The flip side of this entire piece is, of course, this - if the friends I havent been able to keep in touch with regularly felt the same way about me, wouldnt they make an effort to reach out too? Good question and the answer is yes, yes they have. The Universe knows I love them all for doing so, for them reaching out to let me know that even though their lives do get hectic at times, they still care and they still think about me. Several of my dear friends have joked around with me and teased me about having "minions of fans" or "an adoring public" but anyone who knows the real me knows that I dont look at other people in that way because I of all people on this planet do not believe in popularity polls, nor do I send out cries for more and more public attention than I already receive - please, it'd be kinda redundant to do that when you have an anonymous identity to begin with, wouldnt you say? I simply believe in being yourself and letting your light shine through because those are the only ways to gain and keep the real, true friends in your life. Remember, just as it's important to appreciate the friends you do have in your life, it's equally important to remember why they're in your life. So to all my friends out there in North Carolina, Toronto, New York City, San Francisco, Philadelphia, London and all points North, South, East and West, y'all gotta tremendous amount of love and gratitude coming your way, not just tonight while I'm here at work but every night and every day. Thank you for reading.

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

Sex Past 40 - Monday, February 21, 2011

When I was a very young Spice back in the day - a flouncing, spry 17 year old young man with a semi-washboard chest (semi- because back in the 80's we werent as pec-obssessive as folks are nowadays), an ass you could balance a plate of cake on (literally) and fairly gorgeous blonde hair (damn, I miss my hair; it never grew back...eh, fucken cancer) - on the occassional Saturday nights when I would frequent one of the local gay bars near whatever town/military base we were stationed at, a good-sized group of us local LGBT folks (about 9 or 10) would make it a point to get together at Denny's or some local diner for an extremely late-night cup of coffee and/or snack after the bars closed and just hang out for an hour or two and have a good time. I remember more than once that whenever the subject of sex came up - which in those days, was quite frequently! - everybody would put in their 2-cents-worth regarding their take on the subject. Nine times outta ten, those present at the table who were above the age of 40+ adamantly swore that sex actually got better as one got older because the more experienced you became at it the more enjoyable it was. Personally, I always thought that was justa load crap, especially since the majority of the time those who claimed such statements to be the gods-honest-truth usually had one of their hands resting on one of my upper thigh areas while making their point! No, that is not to imply that I was always two-steps-shy-of-the-gutter for in most cases that's as far as any of THAT ever went; but, that's not the point. My point is this - and I never ever thought I'd ever admit this to anyone else, let alone myself, but - they were right! It's true, sex DOES get better when your biological clock reaches 40 and even when it ticks beyond that age!

True, you can have a great sexlife regardless of what age you are but when I was growing up I seriously believed that once you hit 40 or older, your sex life was close to being over with, that there just wasnt as much drive in the 'ole libido, that men took up hobbies like stamp-collecting and putting puzzles together, while the women-folk took up knitting, quilting or supporting their local book-of-the-month clubs. I got that extremely misleading impression from my parents, their peers, relatives, etc., etc,. I gotta hand it to everyone, they musta put on one helluva act just for us teenagers back then because nothing could be further from the truth; but then again, people didnt talk about sex as openly and freely as they do nowadays. Regardless, as I got older I realized that sex IS indeed better when you're 40 or older, not just because you yourself are more wiser and experienced regarding it but in most cases, so are the other people you choose to have it with! Of course, as we all are aware of, there are many folks out there who because they themselves know this thing about sex being better when you're older, choose to explore their sexual prowness with those who are anywhere from 10 to 20 years younger themselves. Hey, if that's your thing and all parties involved are quite content and happy, more power to you. But another point that needs to be made on the issue of sex is something that I think more people need to come to grips with (no pun intended!) - sex can be so much more gratifying with someone who is experienced versus having it with someone who hasnt the slightest idea of what they hell they are doing. In that same line of reasoning, those of you out there who have thus far failed to realize that sex is about the pleasuring of both parties involved, not just yourself, need to keep in mind what I just said]. In other words, people need to look at sex in the whole picture sense before they jump right into it (yet another unintended pun!).

By the same token, don't get me wrong on the issue of age-n-sex. If someone of a desirable nature, in their early to mid-20's on up, came up to me and said "Hey Sweethaht, ya wanna go somewhere and make some noise? Do the humpty dance? Bump uglies??" I'd probaly be very flattered and depending on the situation, perhaps would see where things would lead. Then again, being the Mr. Good Girl type that I am, I'd probaly be more taken aback and I'd definitely think twice before acting on any carnal instincts whatsoever. After all folks, we all must be careful as well as ethically responsible when it comes to intimacy with anyone, regardless if one is Hiv+ or not. That's right - we ALL need to behave responsibly and maturely regarding such matters. Let's not forget to factor in that each and every one of us has a different take on this age-n-sex issue. In regards to myself, I've always been involved with men who were either close to my own age or older; but, that's not to say that I would not consider getting to know someone several or more years my junior should such a situation present itself. Regardless of what your viewpoint is on this issue, I still say that we'd all be a helluva lot better off if we were more openminded about this kinda stuff and again, focus on the individual themselves because age is nothing more than a chronological marker to begin with.

So there you have it, my take on this sex past the age of 40 thing. Naturally, whoever you choose to become intimate with, please be responsible and practice safe-sex guidelines. Remember, one does not have to be promiscious to contact the Hiv virus - just as with pregrancy for the straight folks, all it takes is that one single unprotected sexual experience and BAM!, you're done for. So please, respect yourself and others, if you're gonna fool around, do so safely. Regardless of what your age is, I think one of the greatest things about life is growing and learning new things along every step of the way. Sex is not over with once you hit the age of 40 and beyond. Nor is your life. Thank you for reading.

 

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

Fried Green Tomatoes - Tuesday, February 15, 2011

As the title implies, this piece will be about one of my most favorite films - if not my most favorite - of all time, "Fried Green Tomatoes" (1991). My most favorite film not just because of the superb storyline, the wonderful acting demonstrated by an all-star cast or the fact that it was nominated for a coupla Academy Awards, but because of one very important reason - no matter what I have gone through in my life since that film was released, like a true friend, it's always been there for me. It doesnt matter if I've hadda wonderful experience regarding something in my life, or a traumatic experience, every time I have ever found myself sitting down to watch that film, it always ALWAYS makes me feel better about life in general. Films are like everything else in life, strictly a matter of personal interpretation; but, of the thousands of films I have viewed over the years, this single film alone makes me feel like I've come home. I've loved this movie ever since it came out in 1991 and in some odd way I feel that my writing about it is longer overdue than it's age - it turns 20 years old this coming December. I should've written about it so many years ago, but I've never felt the need to because what I garner from it - the inner personal strength and self-determination of its main characters - is something that is so much a part of my life that it's something I've never had to think about twice, let alone second-guess. However, because I am so damn grateful to Fannie Flagg for writing it, I want to write about it now, I wanna give Idgie Threadgoode and Ruth Jamison the recognition they have so justly deserved from me after all these years.

It's funny, but when we look back on our lives, sometimes we think about all the people who have made sucha positive impact in our lives, yet most of us rarely think about the world of writing and how certain stories that have reached through to our real life existences affect us. In other words, yes, this is one of those extremely rare times in my life where I actually need (and justifiably so I might add) to give both creedence and reverences to two fictional characters that have literally given me the inspiration to pick myself up by the bootstraps and give life a major kick in the ass whenever it has needed it most. I dont always dedicate my blog entries to other individuals, whether living or deceased, whether real or fictional but this piece is definitely written in honor of two of the heroines of the film "Fried Green Tomatoes"(1991), Idgie Threadgoode (Mary Stuart Masterson) and Ruth Jamison (Mary Louise Parker). I know, I know, some of my readers may think "Uhm, Spice? We need to get you some help Baby!" but as Idgie once said to Ruth in the film "You gotta stop worrying about what others think."  In the film, Idgie not only hit the nail on the head when she said that to Ruth but I cant tell you how many times in my life what she said applied to me as well. It doesnt matter where you have obtained your inner sustenance towards life from, if it works for you and it makes a difference for the betterment of your life, then that's all that matters.

I have so many different reactions to so many different scenes in this film, so many thoughts, ponderings, questions and the like that I truly dont know where to begin. I guess the best way to put it is that I'm going to write about the reactions and responses that it has caused within myself and take it from there. So if I jump from angle to angle on all of this, just take it with a grain of salt, which is also yet another message from several of the characters in this film - take life as it is, with a grain of salt, but learn from it, appreciate it and always, always treasure it.

Whenever any of us watches any film we sometimes find ourselves perennially questioning one or more aspects of it; but, for myself, the only question I have ever had about this film is simply this - whatever happened to the character of Ruth's son, Buddy Threadgoode, Jr.? Nothing is ever mentioned about him after his mother Ruth dies and I found that his absence from the remainder of the film's storyline gave it a certain degree of mystique because you would think as important as his character was he woulda naturally played some centrol role in Idgie Threadgoode's life after Ruth passed away, you know? With that one exception I  totally adore the great tradition of Southern storytelling that was infused into this film via the wonderful writing talents of Fannie Flagg.

Movie soundtrack. Why "Fried Green Tomatoes"(1991) is missing a soundtrack is beyond me for I personally thought that a great deal of the music within the film was quite good, not just the songs performed by Patti LaBelle but also the one church scene where the character of Evelyn Couch (Kathy Bates) accompanies Ninnie Threadgoode (Jessica Tandy) to one of those legendary black gospel services - whoever that gosepel singer was in the film, she was fantastic! I know, I should know who the woman is and her name by heart for as many times as I've watched the movie! Regardless, no matter how many times I have gone to Amazon.com or BestBuy.com, as well as a few other online music sites, to my knowledge, no one has ever ever released any type of soundtrack for this film and I think it's a shame, especially because I thought the movie theme music, as short as it was, was quite good too. If you love soulful R& B music, the Blues and a bit of Jazz thrown in, it woulda made an extremely profitable soundtrack, both music-wise and money-wise. Plus, I've always loved movie soundtracks because they always provide a mixture of any film's songs, which also is much more economical than going out and trying to purchase an album here-n-there all for the sake of just this-or-that song, even with folks downloading songs the way they do nowadays.

The film also made quite an impact with the LGBT community due to its obvious lesbian content (which it won a GLAAD Media Award for, by the way) which focused on the close interpersonal relationship between the characters of Idgie Threadgoode and Ruth Jamison, especially atta time in history when lesbian relationships were just as tabu, if not moreso, as any form of friendships/relationships between blacks and whites. This film really does cover some of the most tumultous aspects of life in the Deep South during the 1920's and 1930's when blacks were horrendously and inexcusably treated as subservient human beings because of the mere color of their skin; yet, it also demonstates that there were people who treated all their fellow men as equals, as both Idgie and Ruth, as well as several other characters in the film did. Issues of sexual orientation, race, religion, government and triumph of the human spirit, this film includes all those things and although this blog entry is not a formal critique of the film "Fried Green Tomatoes"(1991) itself, I must in all honesty state that it is one of the most powerfully, emotionally riveting films I have ever seen in my entire life. Even those words themselves cannot give it the endless amount of merit it so justly deserves, at least in my opinion.

Viewing this film in all its original content ranges everywhere from extremely difficult to almost impossible. I'm serious. In most versions that one can view on TCM, TNT or even the various cable channels the film is almost always missing 2 scenes which I feel are extremely relevant to the film as a whole piece - the scene where Evelyn Couch attends the gospel church service with Ninnie Threadgoode and the scene where Idgie and Ruth are having a little chat on the porch swing at their home. Without those 2 scenes the film not only does not flow as nicely as it should, but by leaving those scenes out it's not emphasizing the close connections among those 4 characters as it should be doing. Again, just my opinion.

Every film out there literally has at least one or more major "fuck-up scenes" in it and as much as I love "Fried Green Tomatoes" (1991) it too is not immune from this unintentional (or at least one assumes) phenomena. For those of you who have viewed the film do you remember the scene where Idgie, Cleo (or was it brother Julian in that particular scene?) and Big George drive down to Valdosta, Georgia to rescue Ruth from her extremely abusive husband, Frank Bennett? As you're viewing that segment of the film, take an extremely quick yet thorough look of who is and isnt in the car before the group drives back to Alabama - you will notice right away that Big George, who accompanied Idgie and Cleo on the trip is NOT shown leaving in the car with them! You may instantly exclaim what I did when I first noticed this horrible discreptancy in the film, "Oh my gawd, they forgot to tell Big George to get into the car after he loaded that big trunk onto it!!" And afterwards you may even shake your head as I did and think "How could any director or producer of any film even miss a giant boo-boo such as that one!?!?!" Most likely due to the fact that the film has been around for quite some time, the majority of viewers have probaly never even noticed it and I will admit, Big George's abscence in that one particular scene does not affect the film either way, except for the sake of logical continuity. But still, after all these years it does blow my mind that anyone connected with the film could've let that something like that happen, you know?

Due to the fact that I fell in love with this film upon my initial viewing of it, I was inspired to check out Fannie Flagg's other works and I am ever so thankful to this day that I did. I love her style of writing because Flagg truly is an exceptional storyteller, not just with "Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe"(1987) but other of her works that I have read, such as "Welcome To The World, Baby Girl!" (1998) and "A Redbird Christmas"(2004). You know what else I love about all of Flagg's books? Get this - she actually includes the recipes to the food dishes described within her novels in the back of each book! I think that is so kewl! I've never known any author to ever do that with any of their writings, fictional or non-fictional, and I think what's so impressive about it is that it practically makes her characters appear even more human than they are to begin with; and, I've never known any author to do that other than Flagg herself. Perhaps other authors have indeed attempted this but if they have I am totally unaware of it. I like it. I like it a lot.

In specific reference to the book "Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistle Stop Cafe"(1987), the sucess of it and the film which followed in 1991, gave birth to an actual "Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistle Stop Cafe Coobook" (1995). I do not have a copy of this cookbook, nor have I actually tried the recipe for the dish Fried Green Tomatoes that is included in the back of the novel itself. However, I did try the Food Network version of the recipe several years ago and it was quite exceptional! The flavor of Fried Green Tomatoes is hard to describe, there really isnt any other dish that one can compare it to, though it is similiar in concept to Fried Zucchini Slices, in which you prepare the dish and then either eat it as is, by putting it into a dipping sauce or eating it as an actual sandwich. To some folks, the mere thought of eating Fried Green Tomatoes does not sound the least bit appetizing - and I'll admit, the very first time I made them I thought to myself "Damn, these things better taste good or I'm gonna be kinda p.o.'ed!" - but I kid you not, once you try them and if you truly enjoy them, you will find yourself making them every time tomato season is here. Granted, fried foods are something we all should avoid in today's health-conscious world but trust me, if you dont treat yourself to these goodies at least once in awhile, you are definitely missing out on something good!

The film "Fried Green Tomatoes" (1991) will forever be a part of my life not only because I always find something new to gleam from it every time I watch it, but also because it always gives me the reassurance that no matter what you encounter in life, you can rise above it, you can survive it and most of all, you can be a better person to yourself, as well as those around you, if you allow yourself the common sense to do so. I think yet another underlying message within this film is that shows whatta integral and vital role that friendship plays in our lives. What Ninnie Threadgoode says towards the final moments of the film is something that I think is extremely true - friends truly are one of the best things in life.  

There's yet another thing I learned from this film when I most recently viewed it during my Christmas vacation this past year, in conjunction with something that happened during my trip. Every time I go back for one of my holiday trips, I set aside time to pay my respects to those who are no longer alive, such as my Dad, my Grandpa, my little brother and other relatives. I realize that there are people who find visiting cemeteries morbid but I was raised to treat something like that as a means of showing respect and somehow reminding those who have gone on before us that they are not forgotten, that their lives did indeed matter. But during sucha outting as I was talking with my Grandma, I asked her something I've wondered about in the past. I turned to her and said "But what happens when we are no longer here? What happens when the stories of the past can no longer be told? Does that mean that peoples lives really didnt matter after all?" She thought for a minute or two and responded in a way that made me feel much better about such questions. Her answer: "Heavens no, all life matters, whether it's here-n-now or whether it was 100 years ago, regardless of whether anyone is left to tell the stories of or not. Hopefully they will, but remember, we all make our own imprints on life, that kinda thing doesnt go away just because we are dead." And I think she's right. I know she's right.

And I noticed that to be true even in a film about fictional characters in a fictional story. More than several of the characters in "Fried Green Tomatoes"(1991) did indeed do what I've always done, what I was raised to believe was the right thing to do - paying reverence and respect to those who have gone on before us because all life is precious, and because each and every one of us does make a profound impact in the lives of others by just our mere existence. We really are more connected with each other on every level as human beings than we care to admit. We really are all in the same boat just as was portrayed in that film, and just as we all live our daily lives. Granted, all of this is just one of the random parallels (or perhaps coincidences to an extent) between such a film as this one and real life but the similarities are irrefutable.

Usually when people hear of others who can watch the same film over and over again without ever tiring of it usually results with the comment that such folks are behaving in a ludicrous manner, that they are generally two-sandwiches-shy-of-a-picnic-basket, but I disagree with that rationale. I think if there is a film (perhaps even more than one, of that I think is certain) out there that one identifies with on so many levels, whether it's on a personal human level or not, and one can gleam a gem of wisdom from more than one viewing of it, I think it's perfectly acceptable to watch it as often as you damn well please. I dont think it's the age-old idiom that Hollywood allegedly designed every film it has presented to the world to maintain some form of immortal prescence. I think it really is the human connection angle, if you ask me. As a matter of fact, for me personally, the characters of Idgie Threadgoode and Ruth Jamison will remain forever eternal; but, then again, so will what they've taught viewers such as myself regarding the human experience - that no matter what happens in our lifetimes, we really arent as alone as we think we are. We really are never truly alone because we really do always have each other. Thank you for reading.

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

What Does An Hiv'er Look Like? - Saturday, February 12, 2011

I'm actually cringing a bit at the thought of writing this particular piece because this is one of those rare times where I as a writer actually do feel like what I'm about to discuss is comparable anxiety-wise with going to my local medical lab and having them consecutively remove 4 vials of blood from my body. Yeah I know, you would think that after all I've been through (as well as what millions of others out there have been through too) that I would be use to sucha basic prodecure, but surprise, surprise, I'm not! Every time I go through that procedure I still tense up and I still cannot watch them doing it cause yes, looking at human blood makes me woozy! I know, I'm thinking the same exact thing some of you are thinking at the moment "Damn Buddy, you picked a helluva disease to have to NOT get use to those trips to the lab!" I agree 100%. It's funny, I can watch (and sometimes chuckle at the fakeness of it) any horror flick out there and view someone getting their head ripped off by the Wolfman or their innards ripped out by some nasty intergalatic alien and not even flinch yet if I were actually forced to watch those vials filling up with human blood, I would pass out cold in less than 65 to 75 seconds!

In fact, I'll never forget one time during one of my chemotherapy cycles years ago when I had just had my blood taken and as I was walking down the hallway of the hospital laboratory, one of the oncology nurses behind us yelled over to my Grandma, "Uhm, watch out! He's going down!!" Bam!!! Just like a giant sack of Russet Potatoes hitting the concrete, down I went! Whoosh! Knocked over a medical supply cart even! Oh it was extremely embarassing and once they brought me to I just could not stop apologizing, to which one of the oncology nurses responded by addressing all the staff standing around us "For now on the Kid lays down when blood is taken and I do not want him leaving the lab for at least a good 15 minutes afterwards!" I know alotta folks out there will say "For pete's sake, it's just blood, no big deal!" and I totally agree with them; however, I cant explain it any other way except that for some reason when I see it, my body automatically shuts down. I know that others out there who experience the same exact thing I do will understand where I am coming from on this.

Be that as it may, what influenced me to write this piece is what happened to a friend of mine the other night. Apparently he was out having a drink and found himself in a conversation regarding his Hiv status with someone who made a comment to the effect that he didnt "look" like someone who was Hiv+. The incident offended my friend and justifiably so because quite frankly, we Hiv'ers do NOT look any different from the rest of you. It is virtually impossible to tell whether or not someone is Hiv+ by the way they look, EVEN IF the individual has full-blown AIDS and is very very sick because there are MILLIONS of diseases out there that can and do cause those afflicted with them to look sick and/or emaciated. This type of thing should be common-sense to both Hiv'ers and non-Hiv'ers alike; but, as is always the case, there's always one or more uninformed individuals in every social setting that one comes into contact with on a daily basis. 

I'm not going to write about how angry and outraged I am that this happened to my friend because that wouldnt solve anything, especially since I myself have been in that scenario several or more times over the past 22 years (this August) that I have had this disease. As a matter of fact it would not surprise me if both myself, and the friend I mentioned above, as well as millions of others just like us out experience the aforementioned scenario in the upcoming years of our lives, regardless of how much we all educate and/or dispell the myths and stereotypes regarding being Hiv+, because there are so many people out there who are still misinformed about what it's like to be Hiv+ and/or have AIDS. But if I lived closed to my friend, I probaly woulda stopped by his place to hash it all out and give him some moral support in dealing with it because when you encounter such unabashed ignorance like that just because you have a certain disease, well, let's just say that it'd make anyones blood boil.

Naturally I would not recommend doing this nowadays due to the legal implications it could set off, but in the old days, in the mid-80's to early 90's, we Hiv'ers would sometimes do what was called "Hiv'ers Revenge" which more or less was literally mind-fucking with anyone who was known to be "anti-Hiv'er" as we so aptly called them back then. Looking back, perhaps some people might deem such antics as prepubescent, simply childish; but, when it came to one Hiv'er watching another's back, well, it was the principle of it all. Dont get me wrong, when I say mindfucking I dont mean causing others to think they are infected, but merely giving them a reality check to demonstrate that one truly cannot tell if another person is Hiv+ based on mere physical appearance. In other words, if a fellow Hiv'er got dissed in some social setting, such as a bar, then one of us would enter the situation and set the record straight. As an example, one of the few times it happened to a coupla friends of mine, I then would go up to the offender - in some cases, bartender - do a bit of flirting, make a coupla passes, and then just as we were about to kiss I would whisper into the guy's ear "By the way Handsome...I have it too motherfucker!" Oh, let me tell you, the look on the other person's face was just priceless! Just like a fucken deer caught in a set of headlights, "Huh!?!?! What!?!??! Oh my fucken God!!!" or "Get away from me you fucken freak!!" Usually when some retort such as the latter was said, nine times outta ten I'd stick out my tongue, lick their cheek, exclaim "Oh Heavens! You better go get tested, quick, hurry, hurry!!!" and walk away! I was an awful shit when it came to that kinda stuff but I cant help it. Growing up the way I did, I learned early on that if you dont stick up for yourself and remain firm on your stance, you usually got steamrolled by others.

Though this was all many years ago, I think that still stands true today. I've never been the type of person to make scenes in public but when it comes to defending my honor as well as those around me, I usually do not hesitate in stepping right up to the plate. For what it's worth, there never were any physical confrontations when it came to the above scenario. Okay, only one time did it come close to that. I believe it was in 1990 or '91 and I went with a few college friends down to San Diego for the weekend. We went to a bar that at that time was called "The Matador" (I heard a coupla weeks ago it's still there but under a different name/different management) and one of my friends was approached by someone and when the issue of his Hiv status came up, there were some very rude words directed towards him. So, I waited a few minutes and approached the guy, flirted with him, got him a bit hot-n-bothered and then did my spiel about how I was Hiv+ too, told him off (without licking his face though) and then as I turned to walk away, he grabbed me by the arm and wouldnt let go. Just as I was about to haul off and deck him in his throat area, this really kewl-looking, cowboy-muscle type literally grabbed the guy by the throat and said "I suggest you leave now, while you can still walk!!" Oh my gawd, let me tell you, it just blew my mind when that happened! After the offender left the bar, this cowboy, (I only got his first name, Mike) asked me if I was okay and I told him yes and that he didnt need to do that and guess what he told me? "Oh yes I did, because I heard what you said and I have it too." After he said that, I musta hugged that guy for an eternity. He really was a personal savior to me that night. Trust me, these chivalarous-happy-ending stories rarely happen in my life, I've always had to look out for myself 99.9% of the time; but, that night, I swear, it musta been divine intervention that took place. I dont know whatever happened to Mike but I sure hope he's still around cause I will never forget how he stood up for me and when you really think about, how he stood up for all Hiv'ers.

I'm not gonna lie to any of you, many years ago, yes, there was a physical stereotype attributed to us Hiv'ers. In the early through mid-1980's (and to a degree, I suppose beyond those years too) most Hiv'ers fit the following human make-up: gay, white, male, "the beautiful people" as they were called back then, highly educated, fairly financially stable and very promiscious. But in the last 30 years, that stereotype no longer holds true. Hiv'ers come from all backgrounds, all cultures, all walks of life and what so many of us knew all those years ago still stands true today - Hiv/AIDS does NOT discriminate on basis of race, creed, culture, sexual orientation, religion, you name it - AIDS is - and always has been - what I call an Equal Opportunity Killer. We must continue to develop newer and more effective ways on educating the general public about this disease so that what happened to my friend the other night, as well as what has happened to most of us from the time we were infected up until now, becomes a horrible nightmare of the past. Doing that as well as supporting organizations such as "This Is What Hiv Looks Like" will definitely make a difference in getting one of the most important messages about Hiv/AIDS across to everyone on this planet - this disease just doesnt affect some of us, it affects all of us. Thank you for reading.

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

Best Wishes For A Happy Valentine's Day! - Friday, February 11, 2011

Since Valentine's Day falls on a Monday this year, I'm going to assume that the majority of people the world-over will most likely be celebrating it at some point this weekend; therefore, I'd like to take this opportunity to wish each and every one of my readers, as well as all my friends and everyone else out there a very very Happy Valentine's Day right now today. I hope everyone has a very special, memorable and romantic Valentine's Day this year, no matter who you are or what you have planned, I hope it's beautiful. As for those of you out there who like myself may be single and currently not dating anyone, I dont want you to feel down about this day because this day is about love (every day, not just Valentine's Day, should be about that, dontcha think?) and as long as you can love yourself and then share that love with others, you're doing just fine. Remember, there isn't anyone else out there quite like you, you are special and the fact that you exist is reason enough for the world to celebrate. Always remember that. And keep your chin up, that special someone is right around the corner, you just wait-n-see.

I think every one of us has had both good and not-so-good Valentine's Days and hey, that can be expected, it's part of life. Then there are those who dont give a whiff about Valentine's Day and that's fine too, but I've always liked this day because personally, I think it's just a cute little romantic holiday of sorts, and who doesnt like a good dose of romance here-n-there? I know I do. Be that as it may, yes, it can be a depressing day for some people BUT only if you let it. I have enough to deal with in my life as it is so I choose to NOT let it. For me, it's an extra day to let those who have touched my life know how much I truly appreciate and love them for who they are and for those times when the blues hit, I think back on all the good memories I've been fortunate to have thus far in my life. I think when it comes to this day it has special meaning for all of us, regardless of the reasoning. My grandparents were married on February 14th during World War II. They made a promise to always love each other atta time when the world itself was totally topsy-turvey and I'm so thankful they did because naturally I wouldnt be here today if it werent for them, so no matter what happens in my own life, that single reason alone will always be enough for me to treasure that day.

Of course, one of my most memorable Valentine's Days was Valentine's Day, 1989. Although the entire evening was very special to me what I remember most about it was the living room aglow with several candles burning brightly and the two of us, Jack and I, dancing to that one song by Heatwave, "Always & Forever." God, how he loved that song, and I did too. I remember how firmly he held onto me that night we danced and the way his eyes looked into mine, the light of the candles flickering in their reflection - I mean, you knew they were there, you could see their flames dancing outside the corners of his eyes but a little voice inside me whispered "Dont turn away from those eyes, dont you dare miss one single moment of this, not now, this moment may never happen again." I'm glad I listened to my instincts that night for I've never regretted it. Not to sound melodramatic but if the world were to end in the next few moments, I sincerely believe that the images of that night would replay themselves before my eyes would close for the very last time. Wow, they were right, some memories really do last for a lifetime, maybe even for forever.

When it comes to love and romance I myself have always said to others "Didja ever notice that those with the advice or suggestions are usually always the ones who are single at the time?" It's true, not just with others but hey, I guess with myself too. With our modern world of technology and with people's imaginations running rampant in this day-n-age, I highly doubt that anyone would need advice on what to do (or what not to do in some cases) for their special someone's on Valentine's Day; but, IF, you've run outta ideas, here's one that I heard about years ago and from what I've gathered from the person who told me about it, as well as others who have given it a try, it has worked like a charm every single time. Actually, I'm kinda chuckling writing about it because I cant imagine myself ever doing it but then again, you never know! So if you've run outta ideas on what to do and you're totally stumped, here's something that just might work for you and your special someone....

Depending on how well you know the other person, go out and buy the following: some type of large ceramic bowl, it could be a pasta bowl, something like a large mixing bowl, whatever you think would be visually appealing to the other person; a matching hand-towel and facecloth; and, whatever scented liquid bathsoap and/or lotion that you think the other person would like. Doesnt matter where you buy any of the items, it could be anywhere from your local grocery store to Bed-Bath-n-Beyond, whatever you can reasonably afford is what you should go with. Once you have all the items and you know what the plans are for that evening, here's whatcha do. At some point in the evening tell the other person you have something that you would like to do especially for them. At this point, I think you already know what it is but for the sake of clarity, here's whatcha do: you fill the ceramic bowl up with warm water, throw the towels on your arm and you proceed to where the other person is sitting; gently remove their socks and shoes (if you havent already!); and, you proceed to bath their feet ever so gently with the washcloth and your hands, followed by patting their tootsies gently dry with the handtowel and then afterwards massaging the lotion ever so gently into their feet. By the time you are finished doing this, if not before all the steps are taken, there is a very high probability rate that you will find yourself experiencing an extremely sensual, erotic experience with your special someone.

If you do decide to give this suggestion a try, you may want to have some lit candles in the room and either some Barry White or Luther Vandross playing softly in the background. I dont drink but perhaps some nicely chilled champagne or Asti Spumante and maybe some milk-chocolate covered strawberries may be in order too. Every detail to presentation should be addressed if you want to make a lasting, memorable impression on your special someone. You can always play it by ear but remember, everyone needs a bit of Spice in their lives (sorry, I couldnt resist!).

Whatever you do for Valentine's Day this year, make it special, make it memorable and as always, if you're gonna fool around, fool around safely and responsibly. After all, isnt respecting yourself and showing the other person how much you respect them the first step in forming (as well as preserving) a meaningful relationship in the first place? Have a very Happy Valentine's Day 2011 everyone and as always, thank you so much for reading.

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo

In The Beginning....- Thursday, February 10, 2011

....God created Chocolate....and it was good. I've loved that line ever since I heard it a coupla decades ago and what more appropriate way to open a blog entry regarding that most sinful (as well as most damning) of culinary pleasures, Chocolate? Valentine's Day is right around the corner so why not write about the single gay guy's pleasure on that day? No, not that, sillies, I mean Chocolate! Ahhh if I could count the ways that I love thee Chocolate, well, let's just say that if those way were worth $1 each, the American economy would be in a much better place than it currently is! There are so many things to say about this one single subject that I truly could write a book about it and perhaps someday I will; but, in the meantime, I'd like to write about the different ways that Chocolate is special to me, as well as in a coupla ways in which it most certainly is not - watch out Dark Chocolate, I finally get to have my say against you for all those 1970's Easter Sunday candy basket searches you purposely ruined for me, you sonnuvabitch! Oops! But before I jump right into the subject, a coupla little disclaimers first.

Just like with every other culinary pleasure out there, Chocolate is NOT bad for you as long as you do with it what you should be doing with any other high-calorie, high-sugar confectionary delight - consume it in moderation. Allow me to repeat that one more time, extremely loud-n-clear because this bullshit about something as lovely and divine as Chocolate getting blamed for all the medical and weight-level woes of the world needs to be stopped! Again, when it comes to Chocolate, please, CONSUME IT IN MODERATION. In other words, when you're offered a piece of Chocolate cake for desert, take a normal-sized serving, notta piece huge enough to light several birthday candles on, okay? Or if you're reaching into a bag of Reese's Miniature Peanut Butter Cups, please, just grab 2 or 3, notta whole dozen, okay Sparky? Yeah, it's really that simple. Chocolate is meant to be enjoyed by anyone out there who desires it, just dont overdo it and both your hips and your conscience will thank you for it later.

Special Note to Diabetics: just because certain Chocolate products say they are "Sugar-Free" does NOT mean they are safe for you to consume, both in moderation or even if you getta bit carried away beyond that. I'm serious about this. Warning: 99.9% of sugar-free Chocolate products out there have DOUBLE and sometimes TRIPLE the amount of Saturated Fat and Sodium in them than regular Chocolate products! It's true. Next time you are tempted into purchasing such products, please look at the percentage levels of Saturated Fat and Sodium in those products. What the manufacturers of those products do not tell you on their labels is that when the sugar is removed from those products, not only is the amount of Saturated Fat and Sodium levels within them increased but extra ingredients that go into those products can and do act as natural cathartics. In other words, eat a little of them and you're okay; eat a moderate to large amount of them and it's move over Ex-Lax! No pun intended, but I'm not shitting any of y'all on this. If you're still skeptical after reading everything I just said then humor me, just once, if you dont mind. The next time you go into your local Walgreen's or CVS and you find yourself gravitating towards the candy aisles, do this. Grab one of those sugar-free Russell Stover chocolate confections and then grab either a Milky Way bar or a Kit-Kat bar and look at the Saturated Fat and Sodium percentages on each - prepare yourself for a shock.

Chocolate comes in so many delicious forms that the choices out there for the average Chocolate Connessieur can be mindboggling. Candy, cakes, pies, cookies, ice creams, sodas, mixed drinks, you name it, there is something out there for every kind of Chocolate lover on this planet. Originally I was gonna do a Top 10 List of Likes/Dislikes when it comes to Chocolate; but, I've noticed something about Chocolate over the last 40 years that I've been eating it. Just like with everything else, what constitutes good and/or bad Chocolate is strictly and undeniably a matter of personal taste. What one person loves, another may despise and every other varying degree in-between. Though I may list some of my favorites and non-favorites along the way, the bottom line is this - it's whatever you enjoy the most that matters. Try new kinds and new concoctions of Chocolate whenever you feel like it, but if there's a kind or type that you simply cannot live without, stick with what makes you happy Baby.

Before we proceed any further, another point I wanna make about Chocolate, especially Chocolate bars and/or Chocolate candy bars. Chilled or Unchilled? That is the question. Many a chefs and various culinary experts, even the Food Network folks, will tell you most emphatically "Chocolate is served best at room temperature." Bullshit. Chocolate should be served/consumed at whatever temperature YOU the individual so desires. Room temperature my ass. Yeah, if you like the stuff all goopy-n-gloppy and halfway-melted before it even hits your mouth; but, not for me. I LOVE my Chocolate chilled, as in sticking it in the top shelf of your refridgerator for a minimum of 45 minutes to 1 hour (or in the freezer for about 20 minutes). Consider it a tecture thing or whatever you will, I think any type of Chocolate bars/candy bars are downright nasty when not chilled first, but again, everyone is most certainly entitled to their own preference regarding this.

Ah, Dark Chocolate - cast thee hence from me thou lowest common denominating whore of confectionary-dom!! I dont care how healthy the medical world claims it now is for you, I think Dark Chocolate is just downright nasty-tasting! Blechhh!! Granted, when it is infused in certain cake and/or ice cream combinations it can be fairly delectable; but, only when it is dilluted. Hershey Special Dark bars and anything with Dark Chocolate covering it were childhood nightmares for me. As much as I adored going to Grandma's house for all our major holidays when growing up, nothing upset us kids more during those early 1970's Easter Egg and Easter Basket hunts in my Grandparent's living room and dining rooms than finally locating our baskets of goodies and stumbling upon horrifying things such as Dark-Chocolate covered Marshmellow candy eggs and miniature Hershey's Special Dark bars in the middle and bottom of those baskets!! I'll never forget the Easter of '73 - I accidentally slipped in front of my parents and exclaimed "I can't believe I got dressed up to go to that nasty church only to find that nasty Dark Chocolate shit all over my Easter basket!" It was only a split-second after I caught myself saying the "S" word that I knew I was doomed! Within a matter of moments my parents were holding me over my Grandma's kitchen sink and out came something that was even nastier than Dark Chocolate - that green Palmolive Dish Soap!!! Yecchhh!!!

I tried to hold back the tears but after my punishment was over - yes, pottymouth Spice, good ole' Mr. Trenchmouth himself got his mouth washed out with soap on Easter Sunday, of all days! - my Aunt Elise came into the kitchen, smiled at my parents as they were exiting (then the second they were gone, turned around and shook her fists at them!) - suggested a ton of cool ice-water mouth rinses to me and as she was wiping my face, bent over to me and whispered "I can't stand that Dark Chocolate SHIT either!!!" We both laughed so hard that my Mom yelled from the dining room table "Everything okay in there, Aunt Elise?" she yelled back "Yes Dear, just cleaning the young lad up, go back to your card-playing, everything is fine" and then she turned back towards me, smiled and said "And dont worry about that Dark Chocolate crap either. I have an idea. You come upstairs to my bedroom before you leave to go back to Ohio tomorrow morning, okay?" We hugged each other and the next morning before we left (we always had to leave at the crack of dawn, with Dad being in the military) I snuk upstairs right before the car was loaded, knocked on Aunt Elise's bedroom door and she opened it, bent down, handed me a medium-sized brown-paper bag and said to me "You hide these in your little schoolbag and dont say a word!" Then she hugged me, smothered me with several fast kisses and sent me on my way. On the ride back to the base, while my sisters fell asleep in the car (as they always did on those long rides back) I looked inside that brown paper bag and my mouth dropped!!! Inside was the equivalency of 2 pounds of Brach's Milk Chocolate Stars!! Ahhh, I was in Kiddie Heaven and as always, my Aunt Elise saved the day.

Speaking of Dark Chocolate, since I'm on the subject of what I personally consider lousy, unacceptable forms of Chocolate, I might as well address what I also consider to be inferior or bad forms of chocolate. First off, as proud and thankful as I am for how much the Hershey Chocolate Company has become a part of our great nation's historical fabric, especially for all the Chocolate that company donated to our troops during World War II it is now time to FINALLY and for ONCE AND ALL, set the record straight on America's most well-known Chocolate company. I dont care how much anyone out there claims "Oh I just LOVE Hershey Chocolate bars!! There's nothing better than a good ole' Hershey bar!" Like Hell there is! Bottom line is this - it may be the most popular and internationally renowned American Chocolate out there but there is nothing worse in than eating a Hershey Chocolate Bar and experiencing it's equally world-renowned  slighty BITTER AFTERTASTE!!! Oh my gawd, after a century or so of this country consuming that crap, I cannot believe that it took me, someone in the year 2011, to say what millions of other Americans have been wanting to say for over 100 years;BUT, have never had the nerve to do so because in some warped way they felt that doing so would be committing a hideous, inexcusable blasphemy against our great nation's pride, only to end up being picked up by the Chocolate Police and being put away forever!!

It's true America and you know it. There isnt one single person out there who hasnt ever tasted a Hershey Chocolate bar without remarking to others, or silently to themselves, about that heavy, bitter aftertaste that hits the back of your mouth less than 30 seconds after eating one of those Chocolate bars! Listen to me people, good-tasting chocolate is NOT good because it gives you a strong aftertaste on your palette after consuming it. With the exception of Dark Chocolate itself, there is not one single Chocolate bar/candy bar out on the American market that will give you sucha aftertaste other than a good ole' Hershey Bar, with or without Almonds I might add! Either version of Hershey's Symphony Bars are fine, both have a creamy, rich tecture, the way that Milk Chocolate should be; but the old-fashioned original Hershey's Chocolate Bar? A disgrace, a total palatable disappointment to even the least discerning of Chocolate-lovers nationwide.You're better off to switch over to the Nestle's brand; however, that also has a flip-side flavor-wise, because though it may be more mellow-tasting than it's rival Hershey's, it's also more sugary than it is chocolaty.

But yes, there are even worse Chocolatiers out there yet, and I truly feel sorry for all the kids out there who are subjected to eat either of the following two Chocolate brands just because their products are so gaily-dressed for the holidays and because their parents and other loved ones are under the illusion that cheap, waxy, flavorless Chocolate is delicious. It most certainly is not and I dont care how broke you are, if you're gonna give your children Chocolate than at least make it a point to give them edible Chocolate, thank you very much! I'm talking about poor-excuses-for-candy companies such as Palmer's Chocolates and Elmer's Chocolates. Nobody likes waxy Chocolate of any kind but if you wanna expeirence a Chocolate that has more wax on and in it than a Pier 1 Imports Candle, then there ya go! I cannot tell you how many times I've overheard parents or grandparents frequenting the local dollar stores buying grocery-bags full of that horrible clap and then saying out loud to everyone within 50 feet of their aisle, "Well just because it's cheap doesnt mean that it's crap!" to which I always exclaim right back "Oh yes it most certainly does!!! Have you ever tried that stuff yourselves??" So what happens? They actually open a couple pieces, sample them, end up with these extremely contorted looks on their faces and usually say to me "Geese Mister, thanks for the scoop." Children and adults alike should only eat Chocolate in moderation; but, if they are gonna eat it, it needs to at least taste like real Chocolate.

Now for the good stuff. I have been fortunate enough over the years, thanks to the several places I have worked and the hundreds of people from all backgrounds whom I have encountered over the years, to taste and/or sample some of the more renowned American and European Chocolates created on this planet and let me tell you, there are some that are so smack-religiously delectable that they can literally provide your stomach with multiple-orgasms over and over again! I know, I never considered the human stomach a sexual organ either but let me tell you, there are actually some Chocolates out there that come extremely close to ranking better than an actual sexual experience. There are also some that sound so hi-falutingly good and righteous, yet after you try them you want to scream out "Oh my gawd!!! Did Lindsay Lohan make this shit while doing crack!?!??!?!" Of course, there is a flip side to all of this Chocolate talk though - what I find fantastic or unacceptable, you may find yourselves reacting the total opposite of when it comes to your personal experiences.

But in all fairness towards Chocolatiers worldwide, there really is only one other Chocolate company which I have a bone to pick with left, one which many of my fellow Bostonians will shout out "Sacriligeous!!" or "How dare you!!!" towards me; but, I must call 'em as I taste 'em. Godiva Chocolates. Yes, world-renowned, but extremely popular in Boston and a good portion of the East Coast, as well as all over the country. Yes, their Chocolates can be delicious and to swoon for; BUT, there are two distinct defects in Godiva Chocolates. First, the layer of Chocolate surrounding whichever of their countless confections you choose to taste is TOO THIN. Hey, if you're gonna be paying $20 for about a pound of Chocolates, dont you want to be able to at least taste the Chocolate? Second, waxiness. Yes, indeed. For those of you who have tried Godiva, didja ever notice that no matter what you do, you cannot get a Godvia Chocolate to melt in your hand to save your life? Some will exclaim "Oh well, that's because they are fine-made!" Fine-made my ass. Take out your kid's jackknife or perhaps even one of those cuticle tools and slice any Godiva Chocolate in half; BUT, make sure you are looking at it as closely as you possibly can. Why? Because you will have one very shocked glaze coming from your eyes when you see that extra-thin veneer of parrafin wax cause your instrument to literally slide off the Chocolate! Following your disbelief with the exclamation "No way, that can't be!" you may very well be tempted to follow it with yet another exclamation - "No way, I'm not paying a fortune for that kinda crap!" Godiva Chocolates are not shiny and firm on the outside because each one is individually polished with a pastry cloth, on that you can bet your bottom dollar.

Dont get me wrong, everyone just tingles at the thought of receiving Godiva Chocolates for Valentine's Day, or for any occassion of the year; but, please, buy a small box of them off the front counter of your local Barnes & Noble Booksellers before breaking the bank to impress someone, okay? It's true, 9 times outta 10 the recipient of such tantalizing appearing Chocolates will have bulged eyes and a great look of appreciation on their faces upon receiving them, yet after tasting them they may very well realize what I did years ago "Oh wow, these arent as great as everyone said they were....damn....." Please, if you wanna treat your Sweetheart to some mighty righteous-tasting Chocolate that not only will impress them visually but will cause them to thank you several times or more afterwards, go out and buy them a heart-shaped box of Lindt, Dove or Russell Stover's Chocolates. You wont regret it and neither will they.

Since Chocolate taste, flavor and texture is strictly a matter of personal preference, I will not tell you which Chocolates to try or not to try, all I can do is what I have done in this piece - share with you what my personal experiences have been thus far. You already know what my least-favorite Chocolate candy/candy bar products are - Hershey's. True, the Symphony bars arent too too bad but watch out for Hershey's Bliss chocolates - designed as a rival to Dove Chocolates or not, they still have a bit of that bitter aftertaste the old-fashioned stuff does. My most favorite tasting Chocolates in the world? There are several. Personally, I think some of the best-tasting Chocolate bars/candy are made by the following companies - Lindt, Cadbury (BUT, only when it was totally British, now that the Americans have bought it out, God only knows what will happen next), Ritter-Sport, Milka and Perugina-Bacci. The majority of my favorites are not American but there is a reason for that and it's quite simple - just as in the world of fashion and colognes, the Europeans simply make better-tasting Chocolates, period. As a matter of fact, much more richer, creamier and better-tasting than any American company could ever dream of doing. I'm serious. Plus, you will NOT find one European Chocolate out there that has even one-quarter of the aftertaste that a Hershey bar has. Dont believe me? Go ahead, make my day - sample any of the ones I just listed and you'll see.

One other thing. As much as I do relish the majority of the European Chocolatiers, I still am a true and proud American at heart, even when it comes to Chocolate. After all, European Chocolates are outta-this-world in flavor but even I cant afford them on a regular basis. When it comes to the national American brands of Chocolate bars and/or candy bars, I do have my favorites in that category as well and they are as follows: 1. Milky Way....2. Reese's Peanut Butter Cup....3. Baby Ruth.....4. Kit-Kat Bar.....5. Fifth Avenue. I think the neatest thing about this list, or really any candy list for that matter(!), is that it's always subject to change and that's okay because this is one of those things in life that it doesnt really matter what others think but strictly what you think that really matters. Regardless of what kinds/types of Chocolate you may or may not be purchasing this year for Valentine's Day, your best bet is to simply follow your instincts and let that set your own standards. There are no rights-or-wrongs on this one guys, just merely choices and/or preferences. But remember, if you are gonna get into some Chocolate this Valentine's Day, it's perfectly okay to treat yourself, just do so in moderation, okay? Since I started this piece in a religious-sounding tone, I might as well close it that way too - I bless all of you in the name of the Lindt, in the name of the Cadbury (U.K. Only!) and in the name of the Ritter-Sport. Amen. And as always, thank you for reading.

 

Posted via email from Luctor Et Emergo