Before I even get into writing this piece I will admit right upfront that I am feeling extremely awkward about it because it will be the 1st time that any of my blog postings will be "autoposted." Most people would think "Hey, no big deal, just do it" ; however, I do feel it's a big deal because the bulk as well as majority of the postings that entail some of the most pivotal periods of my life are located in my previous postings that haven't been autoposted. My hope is that my readers will not only continue to read my most recent entries but they will somehow be influenced to explore my previous postings as well.
Perhaps there is a way to autopost the older postings, but I'll be damned if I know how to do it! This Posterous.com business is a neverending learning experience filled with great occassional frustration for me! And of course there is always someone out there who say's "Oh it's easy, no problem!" Well 'ole Spice has a few things to say about that. First, if it was that easy, dont you think I would have been able to load my Spice logo on this damn site by now? Second, if it's that "easy" then it should be equally "easy" for you to get off your ass, come over here and help me with it, shouldnt it? Third, if it were that "easy" dont you think every motherfucker (pardon me) on the internet would automatically be moving their blogs over to Posterous.com? There's this one guy, he's a real sweetheart (and really cute too, omg if he was single I'd tell him to bring it on home, baby...) who's been a tremendous help and who has provided me with a neverending wealth of information - this section of this post is NOT directed towards him, it's directed towards the 5 to 7 other people who have personally private messaged me about posterous.com.
Bottom line - and then I'll stop bitching about it, at least for now - I'm the type of person that if you are going to share a piece of helpful, valuable information with me, you need to SHOW me how to use that information. It really is that simple. But if you don't do that, guess who keeps circling the airport and never brings it in for a landing?? You guessed it, yours truly. Onto business.....
When it comes to humor, I've always believed in and practiced the theory that if you can't laugh at yourself, you can't laugh at anything. It's very true, but most people don't agree with that because they have this pseudo-1970's belief that by laughing at yourself you are making fun of yourself. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you have the maturity and security to laugh at yourself while others are laughing with you, what is harmful in that? And if people are laughing at you, oh my God, why is that sucha crime when your end result is to make people laugh anyways? The only time humor is "bad" is when people make fun of you in order to hurt your feelings or mock you as a person; but, in that case you dont keep telling jokes, you tell them to knock it off. Yeah, the distinction really is that clear.
Be that is it may, the English don't know what to make of me; and, I find that both funny and perplexing at the same time. As most of you know by now, I am not the missing Spice Girl; but, arent the Spice Girls originally from England? And since the English have dealt with names like PoshSpice (you're great Victoria but you will never beat Kylie Minogue, both fashion and music-wise, sorry Honey) and SportySpice, what's the big leap of faith to entertain the notion of HivSpice? Without sounding sarcastic, is there something I am missing here? And I realize that when people see this name, they quite logically don't know if I am an individual with a cause or a spice company that employs only Hiv+ individuals to process and market its products, I get all that, I really do, but there is one thing I don't like - being referred to as an inanimate object such as "it."
I do indeed have a sense of humor, I know that people will make fun of me because of my name just like they did back in the mid 1990's, and again, I can handle that; but, when you declassify me from human status into being non-human I consider that unacceptable behavior; and, I will not tolerate it. The same goes for people who make fun of this name just for the helluva it - by them doing that they are saying "It's okay that all those rotten things happened to you"; well, it's not okay and that I wont tolerate that either - trust me.
The other day, a very minute incident involving someone who didn't know who or what I was happened and though I highly doubt the other person involved will ever read this blog, I did not write this section in deference to her. I'm writing this all now because her innocence regarding the matter inspired me to set the record straight on this issue. I don't know her personally but she comes across as a lovely human being and I hope I have the honor of getting to know her better.
Let me see, what else..oh yesterday, a friend of mine messaged me and told me about some stuff he heard about Canada and naturally I said to him my classic "Are you fucking kidding me, for real??" As some of you may recall, in the last few months I've become somewhat fascinated by America's next door neighbor and have entertained the thought of visiting there regularly, hopefully starting towards the end of this year or early next year. Beyond checking that great land out, I haven't ever really thought of actually relocating there; but, if what my friend said is true, if I ever were to consider doing that I dont know if I would ever be in a position to actually do so.
Something to the effect that you have to have a ton of bookoo bucks, like around $40,000 (sorry, like every American, especially now, I have debts too) a good amount of education (that's covered, a double BA on my part) and you have to speak 2 languages, one of the two being English or French. Naturally, I'm well-versed in English and the only other foreign languages I know are bits and pieces of Swedish and Dutch from my family elders; so, I would have to learn French or improve my skills on speaking Swedish I guess.
There are 2 other avenues. You can have a group of friends who are already Canadian citizens petition for your citizenship but that can be a long, red-taped process. Can you just imagine how that would go down? I can see it now...we're all standing on the border and the Canadian officials are saying to my friends "You wanna petition who???"..."HivSpice"...."Oh, a musician??...to which I would then pull a kitchen spicerack out of my backpack and following the visual demonstration, I would most likely hear the words "What is THAT between Fennel and Marjoram??" Sorry, I just don't know how realistic that method would be in my particular circumstances. It's something I would have to research more in-depth, ya know?
The final option is - and I love this because I treasure Canada's liberalism - marriage to a Canadian. But even that route is something that would have to be handled delicately and with a great deal of patience. After all, you really don't get to know someone until you either have lived with them or have taken a 2-week road trip with them - the latter is always an extreme safe bet - if you both survive that without wanting to slamdunk each other onto the concrete then chances are it's gonna work. It's true, I'm not kidding you. Besides, at this current point in time (I mean that literally) there are only 3 men in Canada right now that I would even consider pursuing that route with - one still doesn't validate that I exist and the other 2 are happily involved/married to their current partners - and, I hope they stay that way because I want all my friends to be happy and in love; plus, HivSpice is not a homewrecker, never have been, never will be.
In closing, I don't know the name of the person whom my friend spoke with about the Canadian immigration issue but I would like to offer a note of thanks for the information. Myself? I shall continue to keep an open mind about Canada until I have just cause to think otherwise. Besides, some of the Facebook friends I have who live there I already consider part of my extended family - and I don't think they'd ever mislead me. Thanks for reading these thoughts and reflections of mine. The next piece will have a more central theme - I hope :)
Posted via email from HivSpice
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