I know, the weekend is beginning and the last thing any of us wants to think about right now, or any day of the week for the matter, is death and dying but that's not really what this piece is gonna be about. I just wanna share some of my thoughts on what happens to us after we kick the bucket. I was gonna tie this one in with my "mini-psychic-series" of pieces since this subject is heavily linked to the paranormal world in certain ways but I decided not to because it doesn't matter what you believe in spiritually or otherwise, biting the dust is something we all will end up doing sooner or later anyways. Naturally, everyone is entitled to their own belief system in regards to death and the afterlife, I am not saying that everyone needs to believe in or agree with my views on the subject, I'm merely sharing what they are. In fact, I actually insist that even after reading this piece, please, by all means, stick to their own thought patterns because then if I say something and it doesnt prove to be true, there might be some negative energy headed my way and I dont know about the rest of you but that's the last thing I need in this life, let alone the afterlife.
A special note here...upon reading this particular piece, some folks may say "Hey, I can identify with this-n-that" or "Mannn, he's really really whacked, I wonder if this is perhaps a side effect of the Atripla?" Trust me, I'm 100% mentally stable and totally competent when writing any piece. Some of the things I am about to say may very well cause an irrational reaction in others but as with everything I write, I'm basing what I know on personal experience as well as personal perceptions. Like I said, I dont want any of you changing what you believe in for my sake for I truly believe that things like death, Heaven, the afterlife, and so on and so on are totally what you believe in and expect them to be. You see, the funny, as well as extremely ironic aspect of a discussion of this nature is this - none of us, not one, not even myself, is going to know 100% for sure what is or isnt the complete truth until each one of us dies. Kinda morbid to say that, but it's true - none of us will truly know what will happen until it actuallly does. And that right there, my friends, is the reason why most people are scared shitless about death and dying - because unlike life, we have no past or previous experience on which to accurately gauge what the experience will or wont be like until it actually happens. Of course, those who are psychic or are deeply involved with past-life regression therapy may disagree with me on that but you get the picture.
The two things I hate most about death - I know, kinda irrational for any of us to dislike something we've never experienced before, isnt it? - are, naturally, the fear of the unknown and being seperated from loved ones. On the former, I have a very good idea, based on my own experiences and what I have studied on what will or wont happen. On the latter, I've always been taught that we will be reunited with loved ones when we die and "pass on" as they say. Funny, as much as I despise the organized religions of the world, that is one tenet of faith that almost every one of them preaches that I firmly believe and agree with them on. As a matter of fact, let me go on record as stating that's probaly one of the extremely few things that I do agree with them on, that we all will be reunited with those who have gone on before us. Perhaps some of what I will say will give comfort to others, perhaps even give them a teeny tiny upper edge up on that fear of the unknown that many of us have in common with each other on this issue. Either way, I'm not talking about this to scare the shit out of anyone, nor to frustrate and/or anger anyone, it's just how I feel.
Before I jump here, one more reminder - remember, any concept of Heaven that you may or may not have, is totally yours, it's totally up to you what you believe in, I'm not trying to sway any of you either way. Also, no, I am definitely NOT attempting to begin my very own religious sect by sharing what I believe in with others, I personally feel that things like death and salvation, as well as for those who dont believe in either, are strictly an issue of personal interpretation. Be that as it may, I'd like to take the liberty of classifying what I am about to share with you merely as "the Rules & Codes of the Universe Concept" because quite frankly, I dont know what to call it but it's there, it's definitely there.
When we die, most people believe one or two of the following concepts - we die and that's it, there's nothing there, we go unconscious, we fall into a deep sleep and there is nada. Or, folks believe that when we die there is this giant brilliant light, we step into it and there are tons of angels and half-naked cherubs flying around with trumpets and everyone is getting on down to some Heavenly grooves going on. It's your choice on whether or not you wanna believe either but I personally think the former is a bunch of hogwash and as for the latter, I do believe it's possible but not totally because there are no half-naked, let alone fully clothed, cherubs in Heaven. Angels are not born like us humans, they dont start out as babies and then grow-up like we humans do, they are created as adults, they may even look like either gender but in reality they are totally genderless. Their voices are unlike anything one has ever heard before - almost like the perfect melding of male and female mixed together. I know, I know, "Spice, you're beginning to scare us, we need to get you some help Honey..."
The concept of instantly after you die, you merely cross-over and start walking around and going about whatever business you have is true, for the most part, but that's not always the case. Sometimes when a person dies an extremely horrible death, it can literally be deep enough to puncture the soul and/or psyche and in those cases a person will usually go into a deep, trance-like state of sleep for a good 3 or 4 days, before regaining full consciousness, as well as realizing exactly what the hell happened to them. That's why when people say "Oh, I hope I die in my sleep, I hope I simply go to sleep some night and never wake up." Nah, you dont really wanna wish for that because of two reasons. First, no one knows if dying in your sleep is totally pain-free to begin with - even forensic experts who study facial expressions and body contortions of those who have passed away in their sleep don't know that. Second, when you die in your sleep and then wake up, 9 times outta 10 it takes you much longer to realize that you're dead and no pun intended, but whatta rude awakening that would be. Most people know when they've died but to not know, to not realize it right away and to wander all over the place wondering what the fuck just happened, how unsettling would that be, know what I mean?
Rule of thumb is that after dying, for the most part you usually have about 3 to 4 days to wander around and check things out before you do the full crossover to the other side. During this time period you will definitely be greeted by someone you know and they will relay to you what you need to do. Usually you're not expected to take care of any "unfinished business" during this period, that generally happens after you've done the full cross-over. However, the general requirement of this time period is that you will attend your own funeral and burial services because you're not allowed to cross-over until you have come to 100% full acceptance of your death. Dont get me wrong, it's not that you have to go through any certain steps to get to Heaven, it's not complicated like that at all, it's just that there are do's and dont's that you will be made aware of. This 3 to 4 day period is also the time period in which you will be allowed to comfort those you have left behind and to check on them and provide them with as much spiritual comfort as you can regarding the circumstances. Personally, I think it'd be very interesting attending your own funeral and listening to what everyone has to say about you! Of course, the only bad thing about that is even if folks say unflattering things about you, there isnt a damn thing you can do about it, you just have to listen to it and take it with a grain of salt. Either way, dont let anyone tell you otherwise, during this period you do indeed hear EVERYTHING that is said about you.
The Tunnel of Light concept....this is true, but how one approaches it after they have died can vary greatly. Some people are very catatonic or confused mentally when they die and that's normal, that's nothing to worry about but rule of thumb is this - when you see that light shining, focus on it, concentrate on it and head for it directly. If someone you know, or even an angel stops you on the way and wants to chat, that's okay but do not lose sight of that light. You shouldnt feel any pain, or any scared feelings whatsoever BUT by chance you do, then simply say a prayer, the same exact way you did when you were alive, and you will be fine. And that one-in-a-million chance - I say that because this very very rarely happens - you cross-over and no one is there, don't panic, just go towards the light but try to veer yourself more towards the right, okay? Nothing bad will happen to you per se if you veer towards the left but it's just a good precaution to not do so since that's the area where most of those who have to go in-vitro are situated and you don't wanna go there unless you are told to. Nine-and-a-half times out of ten, someone will be there to greet you so that you are not scared or bewildered by what just happened to you, usually it's a relative or a close friend and in most cases, you will see them at least a good 24 hours before its your time to cross-over. Special note on that though - just because you are visited by a decased loved one doesnt mean you're gonna die, not by any means, but chances are that if you and your medical team have definitely determined you are on your deathbed, your loved one(s) are there to give you comfort and assure you that it's gonna be okay so that you wont be afraid to die.
When do you become a ghost? Actually, you don't unless, of course, you decide that's what you wanna do. In most cases, you're simply a disembodied spirit, you can move around and talk and act just like you would in real life. The only time you become a ghost is when (and believe it or not, this does indeed happen) you cross-over and you refuse to cooperate with whoever your spirit guide is. You're totally capable of conscious thoughts and your decision-making faculties are still totally intact. My personal suggestion is to do exactly as you are instructed to do, but if you decide not to, well then, I hope you know what you are doing. Those who dont listen and decide to go off on their own are usually those who feel they need to stay on because of some injustice that was done to them, such as a murder or a very traumatic, violent death and they refuse to leave because they feel their lives were unjustly cut short. I'm not saying it's wrong for people to feel the way they do but when you die, your time here is over, there is nothing left to tend to unless you are spiritually directed to do so. And in some cases, some folks simply get lost on their way to the light, something emotional attracts their attention, they seek to find out what it is and they simply lose sight of the light. Don't get me wrong, this light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel thing is notta one-time occurrence - people do get more than one chance to walk into it but it's the time-frames that can either be short or extremely long. I think you gotta ask yourself this "Is it really worth staying on for? Don't I deserve the total peace that everyone else does, dont I deserve eternal relief from all the bullshit that I went through during my lifetime?" Personally, I think the answers to these questions are something that people should contend with before they die, not after. Having your affairs in order on a spiritual level is just as important as having everything in order on the physical level, such as pre-arranging your funeral and burial wishes, and stuff like that.
What happens once you step into the light? I don't know. One can speculate, form theories, trust their spiritual faith, the truth is I simply dont know. What do I think happens? Well, I'd like to believe that once you step into it, you are are basking in 100% blissful, pure happiness and you experience what is total peace and contentment. Complete happiness on the most unimaginable levels, that's what I hope it is. I cant speak for everyone out there but as much as I love life and will continue to rally for my continued longevity, my life hasn't always been easy, it sure would be nice to embrace all the good memories, let go of all the bad ones, and finally be free of pain and stress on every level possible. Spiritually and emotionally, that's probaly what Heaven means to me. Does that mean I am embracing death and I want to die? Are you fucken kidding me? If I ever fall down while walking down the street, there had better be at least a good 20 or more paramedics jumping up-n-down on my chest because I dont care what I go through, I love life and I wanna live it as fully and as for long as I possibly can. But you gotta keep in mind, I love life, even with all my diseases, I still love it, not everyone else feels that way. My overall take on it is this - I dont want to ever die but if I must, then I'll deal with it when the time comes because right now there simply is too much living to do.
I'm not going to go into whether or not I believe in God, the Devil and all that other pseudo-psycho organized religion crap which I loathe so fervently with my heart-n-soul, because when it really boils down to it, when it comes to death and dying, those types of things don't always touch on the spiritual experiences one encounters during that final process. If you feel they help you deal with the concept of death-n-dying and give you comfort, more power to you, I'm very glad for you. I don't have all the answers on this subject guys and that's actually okay because of the fact that I'm not here to give any out, I'm just here to share my thoughts and theories on the entire matter and as always, respect your right to evaluate and determine where you personally stand on the issue. I realize that some folks may think I'm a major crackpot for even writing this piece but as with any subject I see nothing irrational, let alone insane, about sharing thoughts and ideas with others. Regardless of what you think, it's always good to know where you stand on the serious issues in life such as this one and again, we all can claim that what we believe is the truth but none of us really ever ever knows until that time comes. So in the meantime, I suggest we all live life to the fullest and find as much happiness as we possibly can. Thank you for reading.
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