The Jacket - Saturday, May 22, 2010

I'm gonna be jumping around when it comes to the subject material of my posts because now that I am writing I cant seem to stop...lol...I know, frightening isn't it? I should start out this piece with "A long, long time ago..." because that seems the most appropriate for this piece....

Before the cancer journey began I was actually going to begin a process that would have launched me from being an internet activist to a street activist but once again, fate stepped in - those 4 months in the hospital hightailed a few of my intentions and goals. The purpose of this piece? Because for once, fate nor time is going to erase what was originally meant to be. I still want it to become reality, to serve the purpose I intended it for, but this time nothing is gonna take it away from me.

The jacket was to be designed as a simple blue jean jacket with a detachable fleece liner so that it could be worn in all seasons. But the back of it, that was/is to be something else...memory banks dont fail me now.....a large blue and green design in the shape of a giant globe(the entire world) with a giant Red Ribbon(the greatest Hiv/AIDS symbol, at least in my eyes) covering it from top to bottom; a white dove (symbolizing love and hope) placed directly on top of the Red Ribbon, as to perpetuate it holding it in its grip; and, a yellow rose (which symbolizes peace) being held in the white dove's beak. And, above the white dove, my armor in letters "HivSpice." The front of the jacket, on the left upper side, ACT-UP's infamous black circle with pink triangle and white letters, "Silence = Death" in honor of the truth as well as those who have gone on ahead of us. On the right side, the American flag to show my allegiance to freedom and democracy; beneath it, the Star of David, in honor of my ancestors who died in Theriesenstadt.

Whew, I did it, I remembered. Thank you so much God. By the way, no, I am not Jewish, I have been told that if your mother is not Jewish that you then are not Jewish. My roots are but that I was told does not qualify me. Oh well, I still am fascinated by Jewish culture and history and that will have to be good enough for me :) Sorry, back to the jacket...

My theory back then was this - create the jacket and take my position in the frontlines, mainly by signing up with one of the local Hiv/AIDS organizations in the greater Boston area and hitting the streets and getting the word out. I suppose in this age of the internet and world-wide web such a concept would be considered antiquated but I dont care, I do plan to go ahead and do this because raising awareness by speaking face-to-face with others is still the best way to get the message across. Plus, if people can see an Hiv+ individual upfront for themselves maybe they will realize that this disease isn't just about this-or-that group, it is and should be a concern for us all.

And the jacket will be part of my coming-out process as an Hiv'er as well. Its symbology alone will keep me warm and protected, probaly when I will need it the most. Before it was to be created, I ended up in the hospital and when I got out those 4 months later, the man who was to create it had died. He was a great man and a dear friend, God Bless you Rob, I will never forget you.

So there it is, the infamous HivSpice jacket, still waiting to become a reality. In the meantime I will focus on my own personal journey as well as on this summer's major leg surgery next month. I'm gonna survive that and not to sound corny, I will be wearing that jacket proudly - someday. Thanks for reading everyone.