I'm actually kind of scared of this title because for all I know, for all any of us knows, by the time I am finished writing this piece, there could be yet another suicide of a LGBT youth to report, and another, and another. In fact, I almost was gonna title this "And For The Others Too, 6 And Counting.." but I didnt wanna come across like I was spitting in the face of Death, nor agitating him/her. My gut reaction to the new total of 6 youths thus far who have committed suicide due to harassment and bullying in regards to their sexual orientation is the same as everyone elses - unparalleled shock, sheer outrage and unequivocal sadness. There is not one single justifiable reason for why those 6 young individuals should not be here with us today, breathing, walking and living day-to-day life as we all do. Some people have said that we failed them, that those of us who are part of the LGBT community weren't there for them, but I don't think that's true. We haven't failed, once again, it's mainstream American society that has failed. We all thought that after all these years of trying to continously prove to society over and over again that the only way our lives differ from the rest of "mainstream society" is by just one simple factor - our sexual orientation - that they would eventually accept us and realize that it doesn't matter who or what you are, we're all people, we all matter. Personally, I don't think any of us thought that they would be as brutal to our LGBT youth as they have been to us, but that's exactly what has happened my friends.
We need to vastly increase our efforts to eradicate harassment and bullying of any and every kind not just here in the United States but worldwide. Period. We need to start making more of a responsible effort in attending to the safety and welfare of the LGBT youths of this nation, as well as other nations across the globe, in whatever ways we possibly can because let's face it people, what happened in the lives of those 6 individuals - Asher Brown, 13, of Cypress, Texas; Seth Walsh, 13, of Tehachapi, CA; Billy Lucas, 15, of Greensburg, Indiana; Corey Barker, 17, of Shiocten, WI; Tyler Clementi, 18, of Ridgeway, NJ; and, Raymond Chase, 19, of Monticello, NY - goes way beyond terms like irreprehensible and inexcusable. Dont you all get it? We assumed that by trying to set positive examples of how happy, enriched and fulfilling our daily lives are and can be that the very same denizens of bigotry and hatred who have oppressed and denigrated us for the last several decades would surely have a much higher and deeper level of respect, compassion and humility towards those who came after us. We as a collective whole assumed wrong.
True, none of us has the right to march into many-a-parents' living room, sit good ole' Mom and Pop down and say "Look, Sparky and Sparkarella, your kid is lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender and this is how you need to raise them, this how you need to morally support them, this is how you need to be sensitive to their needs and this is how you need to shower them with the unconditional love and acceptance that you do with all your other children." So what do we do? We do the next best thing. In addition to working together on abolishing harassment and bullying from the entire human race, we need to continue to educate our LGBT youth in the various ways they can confront and protect themselves from such bullying. We need to get the word out as much as we can that there is help out there. As long as these children realize that they do indeed have someone, someplace to turn to, I think it will impact their lives in a much more positive and profound way than any of us could ever possibly imagine.
Myself, if I had the power and money to do so, this is what I would do. Implement a nationwide LGBT mentoring program for every single LBGT youth out there. Very much like an LGBT version of Big Brothers & Big Sisters, where youths would naturally be matched up with those individuals whom they share a common bond with, such as their sexual orientation, as well as common interests. Someone whom those kids could really relate to and go to for those times when they felt so alone and isolated, and would have no one in their immediate family environment to whom they could turn to. Whether it be a couple of hours a day, daytrips where they would meet other LGBT kids just like themselves, whatever the medium, a place in their lives where they will feel safe, secure and totally self-confident with who they are as individuals. Oh I know I know, there are a lotta folks out there who will mention summer camps for gay kids or how wonderful Big Brothers & Big Sisters are but allow me to set you straight on both those mediums. With the former, sorry, our LGBT youths need more than just some summer camp session where they say Hi-n-Bye to folks after a few weeks or so of hanging out together - they need a stable, consistent source of moral support all year long, year after year. Yeah, it's that simple. On the latter, dont let Big Brothers & Big Sisters fool you, they may have matched a few kids up with a few adults in a few of the major metropolitan cities across this great land in the last 25 years or so but dont rely on their statistics and irrational bragging - kids everywhere, not just in 'Frisco, or Boston, or NYC, should be entitled to a mentoring program. Oh they'll tell you "Well we work with people of all backgrounds" but if you ask them "What about people of all sexual orientations?" nine times outta ten they will respond "Well, of course, should there be a need...." Should there be a need? Excuse me, why dont you say that to the 6 families who have just lost their children this past month? No, no, no, we do not need conditional, bigoted, heterosexually-dominant organizations like Big Brothers & Big Sisters dictating to us that they know what is good or not good for the LGBT youth of America, we need our own organization run by our own LGBT community members who will make a difference in the lives of those children.
Over the last several days there have been a TON of internet testimonials, videos, and organizations who have clearly made emphatic stances on the issues of bullying and harassment, as well as the crucial importance of doing what we can to prevent our LGBT youths from committing suicide. I've found each and every single one not only educational, but full of compassion. Of the many internet posts that impacted me, the one that I found the most informative was the video and transcript versions of a message made by talk-show host Ellen DeGeneres. When I read the actual transcripted version of her message, I found a wealth of organizations and helplines for LGBT youth, as well as information/websites from other posts I read too. I'd like to take the liberty of listing all of these resources so that whoever may read this entry of mine will be able to utilize them personally or share them with others. A special thanks to Ellen DeGeneres and all the organizations out there who are there for our LGBT youths. Each and every one of you has the ability to make a difference in these kids lives and I hope you do.
They are as follows: thetrevorproject.org or by calling 866-488-7386; angelsanddoves.com; pacer.org/bullying; for the Matthew Sheppard foundation, matthewsplace.com; for both their anti-bullying stance as well as issues regarding LGBT educational issues, glsen.org; National Suicide Prevention line is 800-273-8255; stompoutbullying.org; wegiveadamn.org; and, in connection with thetrevorproject.org. check out the "It Gets Better" videos on youtube.com, they are fantastic! Whether for yourself or for someone else, there is always help out there, so take a few minutes and check out any or all of these great resources, you'll be glad you did.
In closing this piece, I feel there are two main components of this problem. On one side, we must do all we can to prevent anymore LGBT youth suicides from taking place now and in the future. Actually, we as the human race should attempt to prevent any and all suicides from taking place ever again anywhere but since it is our youth that is the most at stake these days we need to focus and concentrate our efforts in that direction. The other component is the following question "Who is to blame for this?" It's an extemely important question. My opinion is that it's the parents who raised these children to become bullies who are to blame, in addition to mainstream society's overall regards toward us LGBT people. But as is the case with scenarioes similiar to this one, let's not focus soley on pointing fingers, let's work at changing the behaviors that cause these problems to begin with. Hate is not a family value, it's been said over and over again for decades now but saying it and practicing it are 2 totally different things. America, you need to grow up and realize that hate not only kills LGBT youth, it destroys all youths, all adults, everything in it's path. It must be stopped. Thank you for reading.
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